Miscellaneous: Today, I spent hours and hours trying to figure out why the wireless... - FML

12/07/2009 14:46 - United Kingdom

Today, I spent hours and hours trying to figure out why the wireless internet on my laptop wasn't working, but everything I tried completely failed. At the end of the day, my older brother came home, and fixed the problem in under 10 seconds by turning the wireless internet switch on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 579

You deserved it 58 306

Age difference

Who the fuck asked you?

Entitled

24/02/2014 03:59 - United States - Ambler

Today, I was trying to study for a test when my brother and his friends decided to play the chant game, meaning one person yells something weird and everyone else has to say it back without laughing. All I heard for about two hours was them yelling things like, "DICK NIPPLES." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 707

You deserved it 3 697

22/06/2011 04:03 - United States

Today, I was sitting next to a lady on an airplane who was very overweight. She fell asleep on me, and violently bled from her nose upon take off and landing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 016

You deserved it 3 047

Good job

By kelster - 29/09/2019 06:01

Today, my roommate has a job interview. He only applied to the job yesterday. Meanwhile, I've been out of work for three weeks. I've applied to at least ten jobs. I have yet to get a call-back from any of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 597

You deserved it 207

12/05/2011 02:01 - United States

Today, I was riding my long board. A few feet from me an attractive girl was riding one too, in the same direction. We made eye contact right as I slammed into a light pole. She then fell because she was laughing so hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 494

You deserved it 9 771

23/10/2010 08:17 - United States

Today, I watched a grizzled, old gas station attendant with a stain on her blouse use my driver's license to pick something out of her teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 155

You deserved it 2 902

18/04/2012 20:18 - United States

Today, I somehow managed to hit my head on a first aid kit. I now have a cut on my forehead and my boyfriend just keeps laughing from the irony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 250

You deserved it 4 168

21/01/2010 00:23 - United States

Today, while in the shower with my girlfriend she was going on and on about how she thinks she's fat when she's in perfect shape. With what she said still on my mind, I meant to say "honey, you're so beautiful", but accidentally said "honey, you're so fat". I'll be sleeping alone tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 478

You deserved it 34 803

26/12/2012 14:05 - United States - Troy

Today, I woke up from an explicit dream involving my dentist. I'm scheduled for a conscious sedation appointment with him in two hours and I'm terrified of what I might say or do while I'm under. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 001

You deserved it 3 366

29/11/2012 00:57 - Canada - Belleville

Today, I was waiting in a doctor's office when I was approached by an elderly woman. She told me all about the ripping of her stitches in a very private place, in exhaustive detail. Of course, today was the day my doctor chose to be an hour late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 042

You deserved it 1 700

This one simple trick! Doctors hate her!

By Anonymous - 11/06/2020 14:04

Today, I received many compliments from my co-workers on the weight I've lost and how nice I look. I haven't slept for the past month, and eating makes me nauseous. I don't have the heart to tell them my secret is anxiety and depression. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 590

You deserved it 120

Advice time

By Anonymous - 15/02/2010 10:02 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, my grandmother gave me a sex talk on how I should take "precautions", right in the middle of a packed bus station. I'm 21. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 014

You deserved it 2 254

04/09/2012 15:09 - United States - Saint Cloud

Today, I found out what it feels like to have a cotton swab shoved up my cock's piss-pipe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 128

You deserved it 9 371

18/01/2016 22:30 - United States

Today, I woke up from an amazing dream I was having about my girlfriend. We were laughing and holding hands, the kind of dream I wanted to stay asleep for. When I finally got up, I was excited to tell her about the dream but then I remembered. We broke up a week ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 240

You deserved it 1 776

17/05/2012 05:05 - United States

Today, my first date consisted of him and me in the emergency room of the hospital after his little brother hit me in the face with a baseball bat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 029

You deserved it 1 990

11/06/2015 20:51 - United States - Del Valle

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my husband going down on another woman. Instead of speaking, he looked at me, got up, and slammed the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 919

You deserved it 3 145

07/02/2011 17:46 - Mexico

Today, I was driving with my parents while explaining that young people like myself are better drivers because we have better reflexes. My explanation was suddently interrupted with the sound of me crashing the car against a parked car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 177

You deserved it 50 580

Fight the power!

By Balphleair - 19/10/2019 13:00 - Lebanon - Saida

Today, my country went on strike and is overthrowing the government, and I'm stuck on a night shift at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 379

You deserved it 114

29/03/2018 15:00

Today, after three weeks in the hospital for a lung infection, I was released. On the way home, another car ran a red light and T-boned my car. Back to the hospital I go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 648

You deserved it 178

Venus in Furs

By Anonymous - 18/09/2019 16:00

Today, my boyfriend asked my dad why he gave me the nickname "Bear," which he has called me since I was very little. My dad responded, "Because she has a hairy back." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 511

You deserved it 129

30/08/2012 20:34 - United States - Chicago

Today, I have a cold, and was stuck sleeping in bed. My roommate decided to wake me up by sticking headphones in my ears and playing heavy metal on full volume. This is the third time this week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 235

You deserved it 2 626

14/05/2019 10:00

Today, I was punched in the face for wearing a Ramones shirt. The guy who punched me said he was tired of people wearing the shirt without knowing who they were. I've been a Ramones fan my whole life and am the only person I know who has worn the shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 936

You deserved it 130

13/05/2017 04:00

Today, my phone reset, wiping the touch ID on my credit card. I can't remember the password so I'm locked out. I tried 'forgot password', but you need to have the physical card. The card is tucked away in the bank lock box. The key to the lock box is packed in one of the 150 boxes we have prepped to move. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 734

You deserved it 2 402

26/05/2019 00:02

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend asked me if I was cheating on him. Surprised, I replied "No, Tim, of course not!" This might have been more convincing if I'd called my boyfriend by his own name, instead of the name of the guy I'm cheating on him with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 449

You deserved it 10 548

01/09/2016 21:17 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. I told my boyfriend I wanted to feel special even if for just one day. He said he would do the laundry for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 458

You deserved it 2 178

13/03/2010 19:10 - United States

Today, my boyfriend complained that we may not work out because I'm "just too needy". I'd woken up early and texted him "good morning" while he was trying to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 659

You deserved it 9 632

13/10/2008 08:21

Today, I arrived at the station at 7:30pm sharp for the train... which was cancelled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 699

You deserved it 15 876

But he's only 5

By Anonymous - 18/12/2019 05:00

Today, I was playing with my 5 year-old neighbor. I was changing and he saw me naked. Then he went home and his parents came over. Apparently, he told them that I have beautiful boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 683

You deserved it 679

30/06/2010 00:39 - United States

Today, I walked four blocks with toilet paper hanging out of my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 850

You deserved it 28 834

30/07/2017 20:00

Today, after my boyfriend ignored me for hours playing video games, he gave me some attention for a little bit. When I tried to run my fingers through his hair, I missed and punched him in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 870

You deserved it 797

06/03/2011 01:42 - United States

Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 348

You deserved it 3 800

Sleep tight

By Anonymous - 29/03/2021 21:30

Today, my depression caused me to sleep through my appointment to try and get more antidepressants. We love mental instability. FML

I agree, your life sucks 808

You deserved it 97

20/03/2012 19:01 - United States - Greer

Today, I was at a restaurant, and I saw my friend. When we made eye contact, I made a creepy face at her and twitched my arms to make her laugh. A woman looked over said sadly, "Oh my God, that poor girl!" She thought I was "special." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 690

You deserved it 26 855

26/02/2011 21:53 - Canada

Today, I treated my mom to a movie and lunch after she'd attended weeks of AA meetings. She snuck in a flask to the movie, and during lunch, she started calling people muggles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 001

You deserved it 3 543

Trashcan addiction

By Anonymous - 13/08/2021 00:01

Today, I finally got my 18 month-old to throw away her trash and dirty diapers. Now she throws everything away, and I can't get her to stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 598

You deserved it 397

15/02/2009 13:28 - United States

Today, I ran over a beer bottle which popped my car tire, which then caused me to swerve into a police cruiser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 557

You deserved it 4 415

28/01/2009 23:35 - United States

Today, I decided to make a toaster scramble. I thought it was bad enough when the pastry fell through the grate in the toaster over. Then it burst into flames. After 5 minutes of fanning the smoke away from the smoke detector, it still went off. Now my entire dorm building is outside in a snowstorm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 244

You deserved it 5 865

14/07/2016 17:11 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was told to rub in my sunscreen because I looked like a ghost. I wasn't wearing any. I'm just that white. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 630

You deserved it 1 296

13/06/2013 23:59 - United States - Quarryville

Today, I started playing softball again in a league after not playing for about 5 years. My very first time at the bat I whacked a foul ball into the parking lot and hit my own car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 218

You deserved it 6 659

Assumptions part 27674

By dads can’t cook? - 17/03/2021 21:30

Today, I was messaging a new friend when she mentioned her dad was cooking dinner that night. I jokingly texted, “Oh no! I’m sorry!” Turns out her dad is a professional chef. FML

I agree, your life sucks 254

You deserved it 1 085

01/06/2019 18:00

Today, I was sitting at home when the police knocked on my door. They came inside, sat me down and told me that both my parents died in a car crash tonight. I started to cry, but about 10 minutes later, I find out they had the wrong person. I feel bad for the other guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 687

You deserved it 103

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Sunday 12 July 2009 20:23

ummmm really if you know enough about computers to spend "hours and hours" trying to figure out why the wireless internet isn't working then you should know enough to check if it's on or off. Isn't that fairly easy to discover? I mean, I have a MacBook and it shows right at the top of the screen if my wireless is on or off. I'm sorry but this has to be a YDI for a total "here's your sign" moment

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Sunday 12 July 2009 20:25

Well, windows is pretty unclear and if the guy was used to using a desktop where there's no switch he could be pretty confused. I remember it took me a while to figure out about the wireless switch in the first laptop I had with one.

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Sunday 12 July 2009 20:23

ummmm really if you know enough about computers to spend "hours and hours" trying to figure out why the wireless internet isn't working then you should know enough to check if it's on or off. Isn't that fairly easy to discover? I mean, I have a MacBook and it shows right at the top of the screen if my wireless is on or off. I'm sorry but this has to be a YDI for a total "here's your sign" moment

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Sunday 12 July 2009 21:28

Samee! Just yesterday I had the same problem and I called my boyfriend & he came over and fixed it haha!(: I felt like a complete idiot Lol

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Monday 13 July 2009 2:10

Blonde moments happen to everyone.

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Monday 13 July 2009 6:30

lexilovesyou, let's reply to the first one to get our comment read....

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Monday 13 July 2009 16:52

YDI for using a PC. And all, yes it's a PC, Macs don't have a stupid wireless switch. Let the negative voting begin.

AMOCH 0

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Tuesday 14 July 2009 14:50

Win. Pure win. I registered because of your amazing comment. Macs FTW

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Saturday 27 March 2010 4:26

I agree with te above, the reason this sucks is because your using a PC, not because your blonde.

Theatregeek788 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 3:03

OP is a dumbass

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Thursday 7 August 2014 16:37

Macs are pretty inferior to PCs for anything other than art

smileygirl123 0

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Sunday 12 July 2009 20:23

ur soo stupid hahahahaha its ok though hahah :)

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Sunday 12 July 2009 20:26

Don't feel bad, I had the same thing happen to me the other day.

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Monday 13 July 2009 10:17

Me too! Once I figured out what had happened I felt like the biggest idiot on the world!

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Sunday 12 July 2009 20:26

Fail.

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Sunday 12 July 2009 20:25

Well, windows is pretty unclear and if the guy was used to using a desktop where there's no switch he could be pretty confused. I remember it took me a while to figure out about the wireless switch in the first laptop I had with one.

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Sunday 12 July 2009 20:27

way to go. At least your brother wasn't under 10...that would just be sad. YDI, tech-master

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Sunday 12 July 2009 20:30

that happened to me loads - im 16

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Sunday 12 July 2009 20:32

so many FML about retards

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Sunday 12 July 2009 20:34

ugh so many FMLs about retards :(

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Sunday 12 July 2009 20:39

Its ok, i did this the first time it happened it me, it took 3 people to figure it out. you will know for next time though

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Monday 13 July 2009 2:02

....says the person who doesn't know how to spell "retarded" Better yet, says the person who is making fun of someone with a mental illness they can't help You sir, are "retarted"

Nearly

Today, I just had the best sex in all my life. After that, my ex-girlfriend dumped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53

You deserved it 6

Today, I found out my dog of 11 years has very severe cancer. Her spleen, which has swollen to the size of a football, had a small rupture a day ago and would fatally within a week, we'll be putting her down tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 8

Spicy

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend came out as a polyamorous, and then immediately asked me if he could date another guy I thought was my friend. I’m such a pushover, I said yes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 117

You deserved it 382

Today, I have an internal defibrillator from trauma to my heart 12 years ago. I finally experienced for the first time what it's like when it shocks me. Nothing says I'm a keeper like getting kicked in the chest and smacked upside the back of the head with a baseball bat while clapping cheeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 612

You deserved it 69