Today, I slept with my deputy manager. He slept with my insane jealous housemate months ago. I need to find a new job and a new flat. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I found out half of the staff at work have been spreading rumours I'm sleeping with my boss. The other half are spreading rumours I'm sleeping with my subordinate. In reality, every night I go home to an apartment so empty that I don't even have condiments, to sleep alone. FML
Today, my boss/husband fired me from my job because I didn't sleep with him last night. FML
Today, I was yelled at and fired by my boss. He claimed that I've been sleeping with his wife. I've never met his wife. FML
Today, I got back to my hotel at the same time as my supervisor and realized we had rooms right next to each other. I thought it was funny and said good night to him… only to remember that I had slept with HIS boss last night. We were not quiet. FML
Today, I found out that my assistant is now my manager. FML
Today, I moved into a new apartment. While moving boxes, I ran into my supervisor from work. Guess who lives across the hall. FML
Today, I've had no sleep. Why? Because my housemate has a new girlfriend and the walls are too thin. After round three of them shagging, I was exhausted from holding my breath each time the new girlfriend screamed. I also realised that was the closest I'd been to sex in months. FML
Today, I was fired from a managerial position I've held for two years due to "inappropriate relations with a subordinate": I was dating a coworker. My girlfriend then broke up with me four hours later. Because I no longer had a job. I hired her. FML
Today, my boss called me into his office. He had a huge smile on his face, so I assumed I was going to get promoted. He then sat down, and told me that he had been sleeping with my wife for the last three months. He still had a huge smile on his face. FML
Today, at work, my colleague started to look for a new job. For me. FML
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Top comments
hmiller2337 11
you deserved it
nonsensical 26
why would you need to find a new job too?
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Comments (75)
tin_cup 27
Sounds like your housemate was better than you.
corky1992 33
Why would you do that if you knew how your roommate is? Unless you didn't find out he slept with her too until afterwards..but she still didn't have to find out. I think you deserved this one.
Tannasgh 22
Or some common sense...
Ramos808 29
Every single cheater will always deserve what is in store for them. Karma will have its way : )
leogachi 15
@20 Who exactly is the cheater in this situation?
lantz4levi 19
It never said they were sleeping together the same time the other one was
ssnow_fml 20
you deserve it for sleeping your way to the top.
9a_1z 12
I think maybe you need a new perspective on who you sleep with to go along with that. Although your deputy manager sounds a little skeevy as well and you're probably better off not working for him.
nickie_94 18
This proves that you can't have sex with just anyone
ww431 15
Your own fault! As much as it's your own choice who you sleep with, maybe don't choose your boss next time..
NotRussian 16
You shouldn't shit where you eat.
saadah 13
And sleep, and work.
stangbang92 17
I'm having a hard time figuring out the genders of the people described.
Busco7 6
What has that got to do with the price of tea in China??? Their genders are not relevant to the question at hand..