Today, I signed my own plaster-cast to make people believe that I actually have friends. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Today, I wrote in my own yearbook with different styles of handwriting so my mom would think I have friends. FML
Today, I decided to make a place in my house for my friends to sign called “The Friend Wall." By sign I meant sign, not draw body parts. This afternoon I ate lunch next to a basketball-sized vagina and a monumentally large blue and purple penis. FML
Today, my friends created a fake Facebook profile of a girl, and asked me to be in a relationship. Even my friends think I can't get a real girlfriend, and need a fake one to feel better. FML
Today, as a part of my autobiography project for school, I needed to have 2 friends and 2 family members each write me a letter. I ended up having to forge 3 letters. FML
Today, I faked being sick so I could weasel out of a chemistry test at school. Happy that I pulled it off, I posted my accomplishment on Facebook. I forgot that I'm friends with my parents. FML
Clout chasing
Today, to give the illusion that I have friends, I wrote an outrageous status on Facebook, and then pretended it was the result of a friend hacking my page, all in the hope that it would get comments, likes, or at least some attention. Nothing happened. FML
Today, I wrote a fake phone number on my neck to make it look like someone had hit on me. FML
Today, my therapist clapped for me when I told her I'd made a friend. FML
Today, I purposely set my phone off in class to make it seem like I had friends. FML
Today, I bought a friendship bracelet. I'm not sure what's sadder, the fact that I don't actually have a friend to give the other half to, or that I'm actually wearing one of them so it looks like I have friends. FML
Top comments
sierracn97 5
why sign the cast when you have no friends? who's going to see it?
DocBastard 38
Steven, you know what I'm tired of? Whiny commenters like you who complain that an FML isn't good enough for you somehow. There are hundreds (thousands?) of FMLs posted every day, and the ones that make it are the ones that enough FML readers like yourself have deemed worthy. If you don't like it, don't read it. And for ****'s sake, if it isn't good enough for you, don't feel that you are required to broadcast your displeasure to the world. You are entitled to your opinion, but the FMLosphere is NOT hanging on your (or my) every word, I assure you.
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Comments (78)
dragster_fml 0
yeah right
Kittehx3 0
You are so dumb, you are really dumb, for real.
Kittehx3 0
What!? Anti-Flood Protection!?
shadow15433 0
lmfao 1. u have no friends XD 2. u posted right after this u got a hand job? so either this is bs or ur so ugly u had 2 hire a hooker with many STIs (i vote u fail)
kevinophamaa 4
wth I've seen ur name so many times
ambition10 0
sad.
indieDramaQueen 5
I've done that. Twice.
sam930 0
loser stop trying to get random ppls sypathy
puttiemonster 0
I'll be ur friend :p
PawsUp_fml 2
ydi for not making atleast one friend?