Today, I scratched a lottery ticket I had gotten for my birthday and won $10,000. In celebration, I jumped up and raised my hands directly into a ceiling fan. Oh, and it was a fake ticket. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Poker face at all times
Today, I got a scratcher lottery ticket, scratched it in the store, and won $5,000! I screamed and danced around. The guy next to me shoved me over, yanked the ticket from my hands, and tore ass out the door. The cops couldn't find him. FML
Today, behind a cabinet, I found a scratch-off lottery ticket I hadn't scratched yet. After scratching it off, I realized it's a $2,500 winner. The lottery commission won't accept it because they stopped using that game 2 years ago. FML
Today, I won 10,555 dollars on scratch cards! My sister got me to do a happy dance and filmed it. The video is on facebook and the tickets were fake. FML
Today, I won $5000 dollars from a lottery ticket and tried giving the man next to me a high five. He had no hands. FML
No cash for you
Today, I drove 3 hours to the Capitol and back to cash my winning scratch ticket of $2000. When I got there, it was pointed out to me that it wasn't in fact a winning ticket. I'd already planned a weekend vacation at an adventure park the next state over. I’m flat broke and rent is due. FML
Today, to prove a point to my brother that playing the lotto isn't a sure thing. I got a $10 scratcher. Thinking I'd get nothing or maybe just another scratcher, I ended up winning a free scratcher plus $100. The second scratcher I got an additional $50. Now he's even more confident he'll win every time. FML
Today, I went to get a scratch off lottery ticket, and the dude in front of me got the same one I was going to get. He won 500 dollars. I got 2 bucks. FML
Wanker
Today, while buying lottery tickets, I mixed up "jackpot" and "scratch off" and asked for "$10 worth of jackoffs." FML
Today, I won a big raffle. However, my name is so ridiculous-sounding that they thought someone was playing a prank, and pulled a different ticket. I was too embarrassed to say anything. FML
Today, I won the lottery. My ex-girlfriend has the ticket. I just broke up with her. FML
Top comments
FFML_314 12
WOO HOO! You're a tall mother ******.
DONTrockMYroll 0
FYL!! :( hope your hand feels beetteerrr
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Comments (142)
iitomxx 2
YDI ceiling fans have a blunt edge so it is impossible to rip up paper
Mashit13 2
i pretty sure OP didn't mean it ripped up the ticket, (it was fake anyway) but that she hurt herself hitting the fan. Or thats what the FML implies anyway, i don't think ceiling fan relly hurt that much. besides, i think the really annoying thing would be finding out it was fake lotto ticket. it seems hilarious when it happens to others but it sucks when it happens to you. better luck next time OP ☻
hazymay 0
my sister got me one when I turned 18 I was so excited I won then I read the back
Thekid2318 1
I'm calling BS. Never seen a ceiling fan powerful enough cut things to shreds, plus the OP's would've gotten cut to shreds as well...
hahaLexinater 0
i throw my hands back and forth. I throw my hands back and forth. I throw my hands back and forth.
TrippingOnAcid 29
Ohhhh, they set you up?
jonahwalzer 12
They have a rich sense of humor!
Soulless_95 20
Never trust a lottery ticket you got for your. Birthday.
PunkPrincess_fml 11
Ceiling fans don't hurt much... Not winning the lotto as you suspected is a big ouch though!
momo3p 22
If you get a lottery ticket for your birthday it's most likely fake