Love: Today, I received a notice that my boyfriend had given me a rose...

By Fv-day - 14/02/2010 16:32 - United States

Today, I received a notice that my boyfriend had given me a rose via Happy Aquarium on Facebook. It came with a date cancellation so that he and his friends could play BioShock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 632

You deserved it 4 647

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Same thing different taste

By blacklove - 12/02/2010 20:19 - United States

Today, I got a rose from my boyfriend. The card read, "It's over." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 565

You deserved it 2 709

By fledermausi - 12/06/2012 13:02 - Hungary - Budapest

Today, I came home to my boyfriend emptying his bowels into my aquarium. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 835

You deserved it 3 109

Nice try

By forgottenbday - 11/07/2012 05:09 - United States - Canoga Park

Today, my boyfriend treated me to a surprise romantic dinner, got me a huge balloon bouquet, a dozen roses, and a beautiful card for my birthday. Too bad it's his ex's birthday and not mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 610

You deserved it 2 762

Empathy

By KidCudi227 - 23/10/2019 06:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend sent me a bouquet of roses with a message attached. The message said, "Ever since your dog died you've stopped putting out, so I think we should break up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 926

You deserved it 282

By anonymous_0505 - 06/11/2010 17:24 - Russian Federation

Today, my boyfriend ditched me, saying he had some important things to do. When I checked on him a while later, I found out what was so "important". A game called Robot Unicorn Attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 828

You deserved it 9 468

By Anonymous - 02/10/2018 03:00

Today, at 3am, my boyfriend's phone notifications kept going off. I attempted to wake him up, but he didn't budge. When I went to silence it, I saw his Ashley Madison notification, followed by Tinder, Zoosk, and Plenty of Fish. We've been monogamous over a year... or so I thought. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 214

You deserved it 300

By Azure_Mist - 27/01/2011 22:53 - United States

Today, I received a bouquet of flowers from my boyfriend, which is something he's never done before. Unfortunately, this was his way of apologizing for cheating on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 286

You deserved it 3 132

By Anonymous - 14/09/2009 09:41 - South Africa

Today, my boyfriend gave me a poem saying "Roses are red, violets are blue, rubbish is dumped and so are you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 087

You deserved it 4 376

By cyprianista - 13/02/2015 16:13 - United States - Houston

Today, I spent an ungodly amount of money to send my long-distance boyfriend a giant bouquet of roses for Valentine's Day. A few hours after making the non-refundable payment, he let me know we weren't going to work out, and that he was already sleeping with someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 185

You deserved it 4 429

So brave…

By just say you want to leave! - 02/10/2023 16:00

Today, I got a bouquet of beautiful flowers from someone I'd never heard of. My boyfriend flipped his shit and stormed out, calling me a cheater. I called the flower shop. Turns out he made a fake order, just so he could accuse me of cheating and dump me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 070

You deserved it 101

CallMeHush 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 23:40

Well, Bio-Shock is pretty cool.

CyrusTheBlue 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 23:41

Bros before hoes. Sorry but that's the rule.

Comments

arielradonski 0

Monday 15 February 2010 8:09

bioshock is cool, but get a new boyfriend

Fusion_King1 0

Monday 15 February 2010 8:23

Yeah. Bioshock is amazing. you can't blame him.

thoughtcrimeno1 0

Monday 15 February 2010 9:33

did you know that nine out of ten ladies prefer the athletic man?

CyrusTheBlue 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 1:14

Did you know that nine out of ten ladies are stupid ******?

daniel361 0

Monday 15 February 2010 9:34

want the guy, play bioshock with him

JameeBilthuis 0

Monday 15 February 2010 10:35

**** yes, bioshock is the shittt !

Elrox 0

Monday 15 February 2010 11:54

Sorry but Bioshock rules! nothing to do about that.

please_shoot_me 0

Monday 15 February 2010 12:41

well bioshock is a good game...

keki60 0

Monday 15 February 2010 14:02

it's bioshock.

happysmartg 5

Monday 15 February 2010 17:29

I don't get it. wat does a date cancellation on a online rose have to do with someone playing bioshock? wtf

DeathShad0 1

Monday 15 February 2010 19:55

To be fair, Bioshock is sweet.

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The Top

Today, I told my husband to stop his friendship with our neighbor’s 17 year-old daughter. They claim they just play video games together, but lately he’s been uninterested in sex and barely shows me any affection. He vehemently said, “It’s not like we’re fucking or anything! Chill!” and stormed out of the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 629

You deserved it 124

Today, my girlfriend refused to have sex with me, because my underwear are Fruit of the Loom instead of Hanes. According to her, since all real men wear Hanes, I'm unfit to have sex with her because I wear Fruit of the Loom and am therefore not a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 764

You deserved it 424

The Top

Today, hoping to seal the deal on a promotion, I had my boss over for dinner. My dad, who lives with me, started ranting about homosexuals burning in hell. My boss’s daughter is a lesbian. Now my dad’s nose is broken and I fear for my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 373

You deserved it 805

Today, I went on a date. We met in the parking lot of a restaurant. As I approached his car he took one look at me, said "Nope", and drove off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 666

You deserved it 286

Today, it took me a full ten minutes to finish on the toilet. I was babysitting at the time, and it took the kids those ten minutes to destroy the kitchen and shave the cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 447

You deserved it 8 125

Today, my boyfriend left me for a girl I know. She was the girl my last boyfriend left me for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 878

You deserved it 3 800

Today, I realized that the amount of time it takes my boyfriend to get an erection takes longer than the actual sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 408

You deserved it 3 242

Today, I got sent to detention for saying, "That's what she said" after a girl in my class said, "Push a little harder" while dissecting a frog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 693

You deserved it 28 256

Same thing different taste

Nice try

Empathy

So brave…

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