Today, I realized my boyfriend's right hand gets more action in a week than I do in a month. FML
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By
Lordosa
| 9
Maybe you should act and change those stats up, not depend on him....
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Earl_KarmasBitch
| 28
If OP isn't initiating at least half as often as they want sex, this is absolutely a YDI.
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InfiniteSunshine
| 32
I agree she shouldn't completely depend on him, the guy shouldn't be the one relied on to initiate all the time. However, she shouldn't be the one doing all the initiating either. It should be balanced, it can be frustrating when it's just one partner making the effort all the time.
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Earl_KarmasBitch
| 28
Doing it all isn't good either. But I don't think there is anything wrong with the partner who wants it more, initiating more.
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zimbosmurf
| 8
Sorry, #24, but in most Male/female-relationships, "he" will always be ready to have sex.
In most cases it's "she" who sends negative or mixed signals. So, unless this is one of the rare cases where "he" actually is the limiting factor, if she wants to have sex, maybe she should watch her body language?
In most cases it's "she" who sends negative or mixed signals. So, unless this is one of the rare cases where "he" actually is the limiting factor, if she wants to have sex, maybe she should watch her body language?
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InfiniteSunshine
| 32
#42, That is an unsupported stereotype of male/female relationships which has no true or scientific backing. It has actually been proven that females want sex just as much as males, there's just different conditions/reasons in which women want sex. These "cases" aren't as rare as you think, I've even been there myself, with my ex, I was constantly initiating with no reciprocation. So I know from experience how frustrating it can be, and kind of makes you feel unwanted, which can eventually just mess with your sex life all together. This is why I said there shouldn't be just one person doing all the initiating, and I mean that in general for any case. I would have said the exact same thing if the roles were reversed. Even if guys are always "ready" for sex, it doesn't mean the girl should always initiate just because of that.
Considering the fact that the OP is complaining about it, and the boyfriend's hand is getting more action than her, it seems as though he is the limiting factor in this case. So they should probably sit down and talk through everything to see if they can compromise and come up with a situation that satisfies both of them.
Considering the fact that the OP is complaining about it, and the boyfriend's hand is getting more action than her, it seems as though he is the limiting factor in this case. So they should probably sit down and talk through everything to see if they can compromise and come up with a situation that satisfies both of them.
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xMaeLA
| 24
Horse shit, I'm always the one to initiate sex, and it's damned frustrating when its not reciprocated.
Honestly makes one feel like they're not enough. :/ at least, IMO.
Honestly makes one feel like they're not enough. :/ at least, IMO.
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TheFriskyBadger
| 4
The sad thing is that I do instigate almost every day. He agrees and seems into it, says he has stuff to do, then an hour later he's back at it again in the bedroom
By
pjsr
| 32
It's tough to compete with the unlimited variety and quantity of porn. Get a real man who will live with you in the real world where two people meet each other's needs.
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Earl_KarmasBitch
| 28
So if a man doesn't want as much sex as his partner wants, he's not a real man? So what does that make a woman who turns down her partner then?
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tomvertigo
| 17
It's also just as likely that OP doesn't ever initiate or express their need or wants. Don't guy the guy down just because you can.
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DanielleinDC
| 32
No, but if he'd rather masturbate than engage in sex with his partner, that is a problem. I'd like to know if OP initiates and gets turned down or if she has been conditioned to think that it's up to the guy. Either way, there should be a bit of balance between how often he masturbates and how often he has sex with his girlfriend.
And OP, get yourself a vibrator.
And OP, get yourself a vibrator.
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TheFriskyBadger
| 4
I was actually OP, and I do instigate almost every day, I make hints, and sometimes I just flat out tell him when I want to have sex. He seems responsive enough and he agrees and gets kinda excited about it, then finds something else he has to do and I wait all day and then I find him masturbating in the bedroom while I've been waiting for him to be ready all day. It really makes me feel like maybe he doesn't find me attractive anymore. I've tried talking to him about it, but I don't think he's actually absorbing what I say, because nothing changes
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pjsr
| 32
So, OP, is he masturbating to porn? I still find it hard to believe a guy would rather pleasure himself often instead of partnered sex. Occasionally, yes. Often, no - not unless he's getting off to porn, where you don't have to do anything or ever work through disappointments or trying to please a partner.
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BrotherPhil
| 32
Maybe you could try catching him and joining in? Someone (possibly Oscar Wilde) said that sex is a poor substitute for masterbation - maybe it doesn't be either or?
By
chefty722
| 9
You're probably his beard and he's just thinking of all the guys sexier than you. That's what I did before I came out of the closet.
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RoboCunnilingus
| 23
You jumped straight there, huh?
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StormfrontX33_fml
| 24
Any partner, regardless of orientation, can have some sort of general disinterest in interactive sex.
By
Futacy
| 29
You should take his right hand and let it feel you up. I'm sure that would make him jealous.
By
FranklyYes
| 9
Do you mean masterbation or fingering?
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Pleonasm
| 34
?????
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Xkillz302
| 10
she means him touching himself and not paying attention to her
By
trucker2
| 33
Buy him a pair of gloves with the fingers cut out- that way he knows what all his bitches look like in mini skirts.... And find you the real McCoy
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whysobeachy
| 37
I'm having difficulty understanding your comment. If, by "bitches", you mean women, I fail to see how women look like fingers.
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trucker2
| 33
A man wanking his junk in driving gloves- Rosie Palm and her five sisters in mini skirts... Old joke
By
ragnarok1540
| 39
Pull out your vibrator and give his hand some real competition ...
In all seriousness, talk to him and see if you can work on the relationship. See if he can start using all that hand action on you, and start some mutual fun time.
In all seriousness, talk to him and see if you can work on the relationship. See if he can start using all that hand action on you, and start some mutual fun time.
By
trucker2
| 33
Saw off the right-hand problem solved
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Earl_KarmasBitch
| 28
He'll just use the left.
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trucker2
| 33
Damn what's that country song.... Earls gotta Die... Sorry 11
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Earl_KarmasBitch
| 28
It's okay. I'm sure there are lots about truckers too.
By
zedjaleaf1
| 11
So does that make him his own right hand man.
By
ssnow_fml
| 20
Walk around naked more often, that should change those stats
In all seriousness, talk to him and see if you can work on the relationship. See if he can start using all that hand action on you, and start some mutual fun time.