Today, I realize that my boyfriend's breath quite literally smells like a sewer. It wouldn't be so bad, except that he tries to kiss me about every ten minutes, and I have to hold my breath. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I’ve discovered that even if he brushes his teeth for 10 minutes straight, flosses, and rinses with mouthwash, my boyfriend’s breath still smells like a cross between sewage and rotting fish. I’m running out of excuses for not kissing him. FML
Today, and as for the rest of my life, I will always have a husband whose breath stinks. FML
Today, my boyfriend endearingly told me that he's been taking advantage of my inability to smell due to a head cold, and he's been farting around me whenever he pleases. FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend how proud I am of him for finding a really good job. He interrupted me to tell me that my breath smelled like his cat's. FML
Today, my girlfriend complained that I don't kiss her often enough. The problem is her breath. It's disgusting. I gently answered, "Well, you don't kiss me often either." Now she keeps kissing me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when I asked him to go brush his teeth, since his breath stank. He went back to playing video games. FML
Today, I was talking to this boy I really like and we were laughing together, until I got this disgusting putrid smell. I started to say how awful the smell was and he stopped laughing to take a sniff too. As soon as he closed his mouth the smell was gone. FML
Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
saIty 17
Just before he tries to get smoochy, pop 10 mints in your mouth. Then as you engage contact spit them all in his mouth.
perdix 31
Get a job at the local wastewater treatment plant so you can be around the smell of raw sewage all day. You'll get accustomed to it and your boyfriend's mouth will just taste like work. Or get a new boyfriend.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (195)
rocketgirl999 2
tell him
brittiboo1 0
i feel ya! i got a bf like that too, but i tell him to brush his teeth! lol
asdallen 0
Ask him if he wants to see who can chug a cap of mouthwash first:p
TwistedRose 0
My boyfriends breath always stinks too! He kisses me all the time
arielzbkny 0
But some gum, and when he tries 2 kiss u, u should be like "want some gum?" and shove 3 slices of gum in his mouth and kiss him passionately lol
Gmax884 2
Tell that man brush his teeth!
icxiibunnie 14
Well you ain't helping out either of you here. Just be honest. But don't be rude like: damn your breath stinks! you need some mouthwash, to brush your teeth and a damn whole lot of breathmints!! By telling him the truth nicely you get to kiss him without wanting to die inside, and he won't be embarassed when he's talking to someoe or if he's kissing you.
shawnagreenbean1 9
Very gently tell him to brush his ******* nasty ass teeth. Oral hygiene is important!
ladybuglet 22
Maybe you should be talking to him instead of posting it on here.
tifferknee 10
i know how you feel smh!!