Transportation: Today, I parked my car on the street to go to the gym. When I...

By Anonymous - 12/04/2009 02:52 - United States

Today, I parked my car on the street to go to the gym. When I came back my car was blocked by a parade of people. I turned to a shop worker smoking a cigarette and said "Jesus! What the hell is going on?" I got many strange looks. It was a Good Friday parade lead by a local church. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 804

You deserved it 47 334

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By karl - 10/01/2009 06:50 - Ireland

Today, we were out smoking a bit of spliff just walking around. We saw a place to sit down in this little car park we were walking past. The cops came over and busted us. Turns out we were in the main car park for the cop shop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 465

You deserved it 44 341

Get the hell out of there

By Anonymous - 01/09/2022 22:00

Today, my friend and I were driving to work, when she asked me to stop at the gas station. Ten minutes later, I see this woman come out, my friend right behind her. The woman spotted me, an intense look in her eyes. She marched over, threw a paper at me, and screamed, "Jesus died for our sins!" She then stormed off. I'm a crazy magnet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 883

You deserved it 113

Too good to be perfect

By Anonymous - 17/11/2023 20:00 - United States

Today, I thought I'd found the perfect parking spot at work for once. Turns out, it was actually perfect for the parade that was scheduled for later in the day. My car got towed to make way for marching bands and floats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 300

You deserved it 343

By moonbears - 22/10/2015 16:46 - United States - Portland

Today, as I tried to parallel park at a busy spot downtown, a group of teens jumped in front of my car and started a slow clap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 082

You deserved it 2 813

By parkingisawesome - 06/05/2011 00:35 - United States

Today, leaving the restaurant I work in, the car next to mine was very crookedly parked. I had a hard time backing out. It turned out the whole restaurant was watching me, and they all started to clap as I drove away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 044

You deserved it 5 823

By greek_dancer - 13/07/2009 05:14 - United States

Today, I went to the mall and had to parallel park. It took me 10 to 12 minutes of maneuvering before I got into the slot. When I turned off the car and got out, there were 8 people laughing hysterically and clapping for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 804

You deserved it 46 406

By relievedbutashamed - 22/02/2019 20:00

Today, I left a coffee shop abruptly to go to my car to let out some really bad and loud gas. My window was partly open because it's broken. A stranger was walking on the sidewalk in front of me. He looked terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 923

You deserved it 426

I'm new to all this!

By Anonymous - 18/08/2023 20:00

Today, I tried to parallel park in front of a crowd. After several failed attempts, someone shouted from a window above, "Nice 23-point turn, dumbass!" I was practicing on an empty street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 515

You deserved it 231

By ohman - 17/07/2009 17:29 - United States

Today, I was walking down the street and while stopped at a light, this old man waved at me. Thinking nothing of it, I walked through a parking lot to get to where I was going, where he not only followed me, but mistook me for a prostitute. It was 5pm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 257

You deserved it 8 183

You, yes you!

By Noname - 08/03/2009 23:40 - United States

Today, I was walking down the street when I passed a construction site. All of the workers started making a fuss and whistling, etc. Naturally, I got very flustered. I stood still for a second and faced them. One yelled for me to move because I was in the way of a girl at a stop light. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 995

You deserved it 14 239

SpunkT 0

Sunday 12 April 2009 13:04

Awesome. Also, can we seriously knock that "FIRST!!!OMG I"M AWESOME CAUSE I CHECK WEBSITES SO OFTEN I CAN COMMENT BEFORE ANYONE ELSE LOOK HOW COOL I AM HAHAHHAHAHAHAHA" crap out? Or can FML just delete those comments? I know other sites just go through and delete stupid "FIRST" comments. Even if you say something else after you're a total douche. We can see that you're first. You're not cool. Go outside.

24788 6

Sunday 12 April 2009 13:00

I will never understand why people go to parades. If it wasn't for the candy when I was younger I would have shot myself. Hopefully they let you out.

Comments

snoopy2010 0

Tuesday 14 April 2009 8:05

MonkeySpeaks: +1000 "Dude, you're so like the single white dude at the million man march whining about how unfair it is to be white and how you have to deal with "racism." Go back to your waspy neighborhood." lmao, quote of the board right there

mattmag 0

Thursday 16 April 2009 0:07

i hated these stupid easter celebrations. i had no food all weekend because the stores were all closed. apparently these morons cant work and praise their zombie at the same time.

mattmag 0

Thursday 16 April 2009 0:23

#58 perhaps more gays would remain monogamous if they were given the right to marry.

happygoluckyhh 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 17:40

LOL Spunk T your not first at all'

bigraws23 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 16:26

I like how you said "Jesus, what the he'll

_system_ 0

Saturday 25 July 2009 14:10

Should of told them to **** themselves and drove your car right through their parade, you have as much right to be there as they do. Though, I'm not sure if religious nuts should have rights, they're hardly people, just odd creatures.

myrl_fml 0

Saturday 1 August 2009 3:38

"Religious Nuts" are people. Just because we have strange parades doesn't mean we're 'creatures'. Maybe you should go learn something, before you go to hell.

SilverStarr 7

Sunday 4 September 2011 22:14

And you should learn there's a place and a time to say bullshit like that. To tell an atheist he's going to hell is like giving a teenager a hug. We simply don't give a ****. Religious nuts are creatures. Not people. Because people aren't retards who just see 1 thing.

050294 0

Thursday 7 January 2010 15:49

myrl_fml: You are an example of a Jesus freak: threatening for someone to go to hell is religious, you're just as bad as them. Think about it.

Thisismypchere 8

Monday 8 August 2011 22:05

I don't think you deserve it. How could you've known? But did we need to know he was smoking?

leesh85k 0

Saturday 24 September 2011 12:20

Wow #7.. I'm going to have to ask u to remain calm... U r the 1 who needs to go outside... Geez didn't really think some1 would get cut over an FML comment.. Heehee... Quite funny spunkT..!!