Insert Ashton Kutcher BUUUURN! face.

At that point I would have turned to the boyfriend and said, "would you care I drop kicked this bitch?"

I am totally picturing Lucille Bluth from Arrested Development saying this.

Some people are just so damn rude. I hope your boyfriend stuck up for you. That's absolutely no unacceptable

I hate to stick up for someone who seems this horrible but just saying - we have no idea what OP felt it was appropriate to wear for such a meeting. Granted, even if OP was dressed as a total slut then the mum should've just bitten her tongue till she got to know her better, but, it could go some way to explaining her reaction if OP did decide to wear something completely inappropriate for the situation.

Actually I would suggest setting her down and talking to her about what you can do to better your image for her. Then you chop the bitch in the throat.

Why would you need to set her down? Personally, I wouldn't have picked her up in the first place...

I would actually have taken my hand back and been like "Whew! That's good, cause I don't shake hands with bitches."

Or "I don't ever visit a whore's house". Mother-in-law problem solved. Winning.

FML references FTW!

Was thinking the same thing hahahahaha

I was going to comment that as well. XD

wow how did we all think that?

WE'RE IN THE MATRIX, THAT'S HOW!

Thank you for making a reference to another FML that's along the same theme, rather than just shoehorning one in for the hell of it.

I loved that

Or at the very least kick her the shins!

Now that's a comeback.. no kickin.. no punchin.. no offensive words.. pure darn sarcasm and wittiness RIGHT IN THE FACE!!