Today, I met a really nice girl at a club, and we went back to my place. I was finally going to lose my virginity, but just as she started kissing me, I panicked and ended up fainting. When I came to, I was still clothed, and she was long gone. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I met a really nice girl at a club. One thing led to another, and she told me to meet her out front in 5 minutes. I was so drunk that I stumbled into the restroom instead, then curled up on the floor crying in despair when I realized my mistake. FML
Today, I finally got the chance to sleep with a girl from home who I'd wanted for a long time. She has low blood pressure problems though, and when things got hot, she passed out while she was on top of me, fell and hit her head on the night stand. FML
Today, I drove my girlfriend home around 11pm to her garage where we started to have sex. When she came to climax she slipped and hit her head. Her parents heard the crash and came down; we were both still naked, and she was unconscious. FML
Today, I was finally all set to lose my virginity. My girlfriend pushed me onto the bed and pulled off my underwear. She then made a face as if she'd just sucked on a lemon, and got up and left without a word. I haven't heard from her since. FML
Today, a girl I have been wanting for years told me she was drunk and needed me to take her home. On the way home she was very frisky and flirty, and I kept telling her to wait till we got to her place. When we finally arrived, she passed out on me and I was stuck there watching her sleep. FML
Today, I finally convinced a girl that I liked to have sex. I decided to swoop her off the feet like the movies and carry her to my bed. I ended up hitting her head on the door frame, knocking her out. FML
Today, I was about to lose my virginity. I couldn't get it up. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered, "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML
Today, I finally decided to sleep with my boyfriend. It was my first time and I was really nervous so when he was being all romantic with candles and wine I went a bit overboard and drank too much. I passed out. I woke up a few hours later, still a virgin, and in a puddle of my own piss. FML
Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner, and have to leave in shame. FML
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Top comments
lemon_lime741 6
well, at least you tried. A for effort
10showgirl 16
Your first time shouldn't be with a stranger... Good luck!
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Comments (128)
ex_omer 17
Well hopefully she didn't rob u of anything apart frim your dignity, which btw was long gone too.
ex_omer 17
You* from* sorry for the mistakes
Retrokitty 9
That sucks OP :( hopefully next time will be better, if not third times the charm.
Saddyohh 13
In 15 years from now, "And that's how I met your mother".
j_cat187 19
If you are going to lose your virginity, at least give it to someone you care about.
smokecloud_ 37
Not everyone wants something meaningful. Some people just want sex. Although my opinion is losing your virginity to a stranger isn't the best idea, doesn't make someone wrong if that's how they willfully choose to do it.
ohmandapants 16
I really hate when people try to impose their own values onto other people. People can have sex with whoever they damn well please. YOU say that they should care about the person because of YOUR values. OP may not, nor does he have to share those same values. For some people their first time doesn't need to be special. Some people just want to have sex, and that's perfectly ok.
PresidentNorth 16
Can't stop everyone from having an opinion. Kind of the whole point of free will.. You get mad people impose their values onto others but aren't you imposing how you feel about imposers?
ohmandapants 16
Your attempt to make me look stupid failed, please try again. You say that everyone can have an opinion, because that's free will, and that's true. However, you can have an opinion without trying to tell other people how to live THEIR lives.
Merylwen 24
@88 Everyone is indeed entitled to their own opinion. But you're the only one being aggressive about it.
GangstaPenguin 7
They said to "at least try". Not really telling them how to live their lives... I say **** it, everyone is gonna say what they want, and it's always going to bother or offend somebody else. Like me. Like it's bothering you. Like it's bothering the people attacking you with commments. Oh well.
Thunderstruck14 30
How is saying that imposing things on people is wrong, imposing? It just means that OP can lose his virginity the way he chooses (given its legal), and that its not nice of us to tell him he shouldn't do it the way he chose. Its simply stating that others may chose to have sex differently that you and that, while its okay for you to voice your opinion, its not nice to say that others should follow your opinion too.
blurider17 11
It happens lol
Hiimhaileypotter 52
To you, I assume?
pratikp03 22
Nice try dude, people saying first time should be special is overrated. Better luck next time.
boshbish 14
Hopefully when you lose your virginity it'll be to someone you've got to know first. There's so much pressure on one night stands as it's solely on the pleasure. No wonder you fainted, considering you haven't done it before. it feels so much better in every way with someone you've fall for
Thunderstruck14 30
I feel like a one night stand would be less pressure, since it doesn't mean much. It definitely could cause more anxiety though, since your sexual partner isn't someone you can really trust. Also, talking and getting to know each others sexual preferences is important and its harder to communicate with someone you just met.
Capitan 15
At least you woke up in the same spot.
sammyjo06 14
The idea of virginity is way overrated. It doesn't matter how you lose it, but if it's some girl you just met, you'd better hope she's really nice and/or that you're both drunk enough to not care about your performance.
EdenCrystal 21
Don't let it get you down; if she was that nice of a person she would have stayed to make sure you were okay.