Today, I met a really nice girl at a club, and we went back to my place. I was finally going to lose my virginity, but just as she started kissing me, I panicked and ended up fainting. When I came to, I was still clothed, and she was long gone. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I met a really nice girl at a club. One thing led to another, and she told me to meet her out front in 5 minutes. I was so drunk that I stumbled into the restroom instead, then curled up on the floor crying in despair when I realized my mistake. FML
Today, I finally got the chance to sleep with a girl from home who I'd wanted for a long time. She has low blood pressure problems though, and when things got hot, she passed out while she was on top of me, fell and hit her head on the night stand. FML
Today, I drove my girlfriend home around 11pm to her garage where we started to have sex. When she came to climax she slipped and hit her head. Her parents heard the crash and came down; we were both still naked, and she was unconscious. FML
Today, I was finally all set to lose my virginity. My girlfriend pushed me onto the bed and pulled off my underwear. She then made a face as if she'd just sucked on a lemon, and got up and left without a word. I haven't heard from her since. FML
Today, a girl I have been wanting for years told me she was drunk and needed me to take her home. On the way home she was very frisky and flirty, and I kept telling her to wait till we got to her place. When we finally arrived, she passed out on me and I was stuck there watching her sleep. FML
Today, I finally convinced a girl that I liked to have sex. I decided to swoop her off the feet like the movies and carry her to my bed. I ended up hitting her head on the door frame, knocking her out. FML
Today, I was about to lose my virginity. I couldn't get it up. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered, "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML
Today, I finally decided to sleep with my boyfriend. It was my first time and I was really nervous so when he was being all romantic with candles and wine I went a bit overboard and drank too much. I passed out. I woke up a few hours later, still a virgin, and in a puddle of my own piss. FML
Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner, and have to leave in shame. FML
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Top comments
lemon_lime741 6
well, at least you tried. A for effort
10showgirl 16
Your first time shouldn't be with a stranger... Good luck!
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Comments (128)
thelittlemissy 29
Believe me, having sex for the first time with someone you love/care about doesn't make it more special. And it doesn't mean you wont regret it afterwards.
Raging_hamster 5
And this is why love is beginning to diminish.
duuuh1 11
Just because that's your experience doesn't mean it holds true for everyone.
TheFinnishFlash 5
for the people who are saying not to bang ***** from bars, shut up.. I'm pretty sure OP has gotten to the point where he just wants to get the virginity thing over with and move on, bang the ****, live long and prosper...
ahsanmasood 4
give it time love, it'll happen when it'll happen :) though...you should probably go and see a doctor, i don't think its normal to faint just like that?
EvilLittleMan 23
My best advice OP is to steer clear of the Frijoles. That includes the ones on your dinner plate as well as the one you brought home from the club. Best of luck.
Pixiecrack 11
How old are you?
Raging_hamster 5
So.. you're just gonna give it to someone worthless? That's pretty stupid.
Tessa_11 19
I think you should wait for someone better than a girl you just met at a club. I think it should be special. When you find that girl you'll be happy you didnt give it to someone else.
am_bugg 20
You might want to check if all of your things are still there...
chrisstachon 30
I'm sure you're not the only one...
Omniprism 14
What a bitch for leaving you. There could have been something seriously wrong. Well at least she didn't take your wallet.