Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Misleading
Today, I was at a club with a friend. A cute guy kept smiling and looking over at me. He left his seat and went to the bar and brought back two drinks. He waved me over and then said, "Can you tell your hot friend that I bought her a drink?" FML
Peter and Pan
Today, after a great double date with my best friend and two really hot guys, we went back to my place. My friend and I left the guys in the living room to go grab some more wine. When we came back, we found our dates making out with each other on the couch. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me as I was getting ready for bed and asked me to pick him up from the bar. Being a loving girlfriend I drive the 45 minutes; when I get there his friend informs me he left about 45 minutes ago. FML
Today, I went out drinking with my friends. Being safe as we were a little intoxicated, we took a taxi back. The cab driver was also drunk. FML
Today, I met a girl at a bar. After buying her a few drinks, we decided to head back to her place. Not wanting to leave either of our cars, I followed her home. While driving, she sent me text because she missed her exit. I tried to text her back something witty and instead rear ended her. FML
Today, I met a great guy at the bar, and we went back to my place. He left before I woke up, leaving a badly-scrawled note saying, "Gone to work, call me!" I couldn't make out the number. FML
Today, the guy I've been sleeping with for the last three weeks got really drunk. I drove him home from the party and took care of him. At 2am he asked for the phone. When I asked what for, he said he wanted to drunk dial his girlfriend. FML
Debate bros
Today, I had a fancy dinner date with a really hot guy. Near the end of our meal, he asked if I wanted to go back to his place. As soon as we walked in the door, he started a religious debate with his roommate. It's been 45 minutes and it's still going. FML
Today, I finally found the courage to ask a guy I like out for a drink. He accepted, we drank, and when it came time to go home, I half-drunkenly left him my number. Once I got back home, I realized I'd actually given him my dad's number instead. FML
Disappointed
Today, I was driving in a busy area looking for a place to park. I happened to lock eyes with a really handsome man who was walking alongside the road. He approached my car with a huge, gorgeous smile, and as I rolled my window down, he asked, "Are you my Uber?" FML
Top comments
SkoomaKi 28
Unlucky OP, but quite creative on his part.
the_true_batman 10
Seducingly? I think you mean seductively. And you totally deserved it.
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Comments (251)
mea_iloveskiing 26
Here I am!! =)
pexy_fml 16
At least he shared the taxi with you
Albarufus 13
Haha!
havocmike 3
you sound fat
br0ccoli 15
152-I'm on the same boat as you and I don't think it's optimal that people sleep around, but there's no need to be so judgmental. There's so much hate in your comment. You need to relax. People are going to do what the want to. Just live your life the way you want, because you cant shove your beliefs down people's throats. That would be wrong in itself. After all, I'm sure you make mistakes also. As Oprah said, "when you know better, you do better.". Maybe those same people grew up in a tough environment and were sexually abused and they feel that they are not worthy and that's how they get their feelings of love. It's all they know. What kind of human being would you be to judge them lower than dirt for a circumstance beyond their control? Be thankful that you know better.
ncktyu 0
HAHAHAHAHA
iviviii 0
Lmao at 105 I know, exactly why I don't waste my time lolololol
saksxalmo 20
#111, that's great if you feel that way, but why do you have to bash other people for what they choose to do? Don't act like you're better than everyone else just because you do things differently. #116, you're assuming that she wouldn't use protection with a stranger, which would make her and the stranger stupid, but it would be her decision not to have safe sex that was stupid, not her decision to have sex outside a relationship. Yes, I know you can still get pregnant or get STDs with protection, but you can also get pregnant or get STDs from having sex in a relationship. Basically, her wanting a one-night stand doesn't directly relate to or imply STDs or pregnancy...
br0ccoli 15
^^ meant for misshayleyjames 146 Smh Edit: I am confused.
littlecityof 3
That's what you get for picking guys up at bars