Today, I made a patient really happy. I work in a long term care facility and was changing a woman's diaper. While cleaning her, I somehow managed to give her an orgasm with a warm wash cloth. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Same thing different taste
Today, I made a nursing home resident laugh so hard that he had a heart attack. FML
Today, I spent the first two hours of my shift cleaning up liquid poo after an elderly lady sat in one of our chairs and promptly let go of her bowels. I was so embarrassed for her that I even bought her a towel, underwear, and a pair of pants. She then thanked one of my coworkers for all the help. FML
Today, at work where I'm a physiotherapist, I was helping a patient with lower back pain. While I was massaging him, he shat himself. FML
Today, I was helping my elderly dementia client with her toilet. I reached in both front and back to pull up her pants for her. "Not too hard, nice and easy..." she said with a weird smile. I looked over to see I was actually pulling her nipple. FML
Today, I was cleaning one of my disabled clients because he pooped himself, so I started to undress him for a shower. I took his dirty diaper off and set it on his bed, then I bent over to take off his socks at which point he put the diaper on my head like a hat. FML
Today, I was taking a dump at work at a nursing home. While reaching for the toilet paper, I accidently pushed the emergency button. The nursing supervisors broke into the washroom to help. FML
Frozen
Today, while volunteering at a senior care center, I witnessed a woman begin to remove her trousers. Then she began tearing apart her diaper. She then began to explore her body. I was unable to stop her. FML
Today, I made an attempt to be nicer to customers at my job as instructed, which resulted in me listening to a handful of elderly people's incontinence issues, and a meth-addict's multiple abortions in detail. FML
Today, while working as a paramedic, we got called to an assisted living home. The medical emergency? The woman had a leak in her bathroom and wanted it fixed. FML
Leave it
Today, I was working my shift at our local nursing home. I was assisting a "sweet", "innocent" 100-year-old lady, and she had a bunch of used tissues balled up in her lap, so I offered to dispose of them in the waste-basket. She told me that if I touched them, she would kill everything I love. FML
Top comments
redbluegreen 41
Oh wow. I just threw up in my mouth a little.
jio_freed 0
You must have magic fingers
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Comments (234)
Tsukasa_fml 0
Some overreactive comments... I mean ew, but not THAT ew. I guess the interweb has just desensitized me to gross things.
jgrissom 0
Ydi
chinesedemocracy 0
oh god. fyl. and ydi for putting that image in my mind.
AmandaX304 0
DUMBASS
FMLwrestler 0
Hey, you never know- maybe you're onto something... Plus, oral must be alot better, they dont even have teeth anymore and their gums- oh so soft. Go get em you manly stud! Make that gram-ma proud!
cutie4281 0
I'm sorry but a little cleaning is not going to get you off. It's like saying "I was babysitting today and changed the baby's diaper and the baby climaxed." if you got a patient off, you must have been scrubbing grafiti off the wall.
Kid011 0
Ewwwwww nd ewww dat iz so nasty i think u shoulda kept dat to yo self.
applejackk 0
Thats soo0 disgusting i couldnt stop squirming just by imagining her face.. Was she an elder? Ewwwwww! Gross. Ew ew ew i feel badfor youu lmao
eliz3 0
Vile. Just vile.
UrRightFML 0
Now thats a FML!!