Today, I locked myself out and had to enter my house via the back door. Thinking I was an intruder, my 7-year-old daughter slammed a metal rake into the back of my head. Nice to know she can take care of herself. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Confused
Today, I locked myself out of the house I was house-sitting. An hour later, and my fifth attempt at climbing the fence, I figured I'd try the door one more time. Turns out I was turning the handle the wrong way and the door wasn't locked in the first place. FML
I don't know my strength
Today, I gave the back door a slight nudge to make sure it was latched shut. Of course, it flew wide open, causing me to smash my face into the doorframe, fall out onto the back porch writhing in pain, and have blood pissing out of my face. FML
Stuck
Today, I found myself locked out of my house. I had to squeeze myself through a tiny window around the back. While hanging upside down, my hood fell over my head. My dog ran through to investigate the noise and ravaged me thinking I was a burglar. I then fell and broke my wrist. FML
Today, I was locked out of my house. After hours of trying to break the door, I found out I accidentally left a window open. The door, however, still needs to be replaced. FML
Let 'em in
Today, I was in my backyard. When I wanted to come back in the house, I tried to open the sliding door. I knew that my brother locked me out so I banged on the door very hard, causing the glass to break. It turns out that the door wasn't locked. FML
Call the Midwife-slash-Locksmith
Today, my one-year-old son locked me out of the house. I had no spare key and both him and my 4-month-old decided that was the perfect time to scream bloody murder. FML
Today, my doorknob broke. While trying to impress my dad and show that I can fix things for girls, I somehow managed to lock myself in my room, with the doorknob on the other side of the door. When my dad finally heard my screams, he let me out. He had to take the whole door off. FML
Stuck
Today, the door to my daughter's room became jammed and wouldn't open while she was in the room. Being resourceful, I grabbed my ladder and climbed up to her window, only to end up stuck in her window. I'm not sure what was worse, getting stuck, or being laughed at by my neighbors for a while. FML
Today, I needed to grab something from the garage. As soon as the door closed, I heard a little click sound. My one-year-old seems to have figured out the door lock. FML
This is terrible!
Today, as I stepped out the door and heard it lock behind me, I realized I had forgotten both my keys and my baby inside. There's no other way in. FML
Top comments
tpm45 25
Hey, at least she'd have been safe if it was an intruder.
ksktwin84 14
She had a metal rake inside?
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Comments (109)
rawlings123 17
Why not just ask her to open the door?
Futacy 29
Future assassin girl.
RudderV 10
Why didn't you just knock? Lol
skittyskatbrat 19
It was a painful way to learn it, but now you KNOW your daughter can and will act when threatened. Sir, that's worth every headache in the world!
JuliannVo 11
Your daughter's smart for protecting herself.
kittykat033 10
That girl deserves an ice cream
characterswap 3
I feel bad for you
synsam 4
so knocking, phone, email , uh looking into the window, yelling "hey (kids name) open the door"...none of that would have worked to get a 7 year olds attention?
Crazc 15
ydi for not announcing yourself when you have a little kid in the house
mkcherry 14
I was kind of expecting this to end with you getting shot, thank goodness it was just a rake. Id be kind of proud of my kid if I was you.