Today, I kissed my husband and said, "I love you." That's when our 5 year-old son said to my husband, "How can you love her so much if she's so ugly?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my wife told my 7-year-old son that he looks just like me. He began crying and said, "I don't want to be ugly like him." FML
Today, I was watching TV with my husband and my 5-year-old son. Everything was going fine until my son asked his father, “Why can’t mom know that you have another sweetheart?” FML
Today, I ate at a friend's house. Her 5-year-old son, who was at the table with us, looked at me and said quietly, "You're ugly." My friend told him off, causing him to cry, and shout, "But she isn't pretty!" FML
Today, my son was having a hard time mentally, and asked my wife if she loved him as much as she loved her biological children. She straight up told him not to be stupid, because of course she doesn’t love a step-kid as much as she loves her "real kids." FML
Today, I looked deep into my wife's eyes and told her how much I loved her and how much she meant to me. Her reply was, "Clean your glasses." FML
Today, I was walking through the store when I saw a little boy point to me and say something to his mom. I was out of earshot at the time, but I got close enough just in time to hear the mom reply, "God says we have to love everyone, even if they're ugly." FML
Today, I was lying beside my 5-year-old son to help him get to sleep. He turned his head and asked, "Daddy, why do you suck so much?" FML
Today, I was sitting on the couch with my 5 year-old on my lap. All of a sudden, she turned to me and said, "Daddy, I love your boobies. They're a good pillow." My own kid just called me fat. FML
Today, at work, a little boy shyly told his mom he thought I was cute. I smiled at him as she looked me up and down and said to him, "Eww, honey. No, you do not!" FML
Today, I was at a restaurant with my kids. I told my 13 year old about how the very first time she said she loved me. She was 2 and it was at this very restaurant. I told her the details and even started tearing up a little. She didn't even look up from her cell phone and said, "That's fab, ma." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
SituationMan 0
This is a sign that your child does not fear you enough. Corporal punishment works.
luv2sing247 0
If my son ever said that to me, I would make him address me as "ma'am" instead of "mom" from then on to show more respect. I'm sure you are a lovely lady. :)
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (146)
normandin131 0
Smack him.
RedNymph234 0
My question is, where do kids hear these horrible things? Their parents or the other older people around them....kids are sponges and shallow people mold the next generation
shamille 5
5 years is a long enough life.
omgzitsjen 0
You should've said "If I'm ugly so are you....same genes."
mibster 0
well isn't your son just a bundle of joy ^-^"
Glitchman_fml 0
As much as I usually disapprove of unecessary corporal punishment, you should smack that kid up. I know most contemporary bleeding-heart parents refuse to engage in such a "barbaric" practice, but it sure as hell makes kids respect their elders.
at0micmin3r 23
Pssh! He's only five. You gonna get all butt hurt over a five year old?
FMySput 0
Your child is an idiot. Not because he called you ugly and that is mean/wrong/whatever. But because he is (likely) genetically-linked to you and that means he is also most likely fugly. At the same time, one may argue that he might look more like your husband because he is a boy. Who also is most likely ugly if what your child says is true (95% of the time, the ugly attract the ugly). So either way, your child is ******. If he's right, karma - you two are even. If he's wrong... then that's boring ;). You should probably kick him in the head either way.
sexxiness2121 0
omg everyone you dont tell ur son that hes ugly! He will cry!!! stupid stupid people. well kids will be kids, gotta love them
PokeyStix 3
Tear that child a new ass.