Miscellaneous: Today, I just drank a sip of beer and felt something so I spit... - FML

By Kristen Duncan - 01/08/2017 20:00 - United States - Spokane

Today, I just drank a sip of beer and felt something so I spit it out... It was an earwig. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 548

You deserved it 428

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Same thing different taste

Fancy a pint?

By Anonymous - 04/09/2020 22:02 - United States - Tyler

Today, while I was relaxing outside drinking a beer after a long day, a moth decided to fly right into my ear canal. I instinctively threw my hand up to swat it out. With the same hand holding the beer. I soaked the side of my face and down my ear. At least I got the bug out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 998

You deserved it 315

By jess - 07/03/2010 14:08 - South Africa

Today, I had a sip of my coffee and felt a lump of some kind enter my mouth. I thought it was a bit of biscuit, and then remembered I didn't have biscuits this morning with my coffee. I took it out of my mouth and it was a huge black fly. I then spat the rest of my coffee all over my laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 032

You deserved it 4 689

By jaqlove - 02/07/2016 20:28 - United States - Clementon

Today, I woke up with a cockroach in my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 028

You deserved it 2 643

Creepy Crawly

By chelseasdead - 04/07/2021 06:01

Today, I was smoking a cigarette outside and kept thinking I saw something moving out of the corner of my eye. I would look and there was nothing there, so I kept brushing it off. Finally I figured out it was an earwig crawling through my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 897

You deserved it 137

By yum - 07/07/2013 05:09 - United States - Sylmar

Today, I was drinking from a cup with a built-in straw. After taking a long sip, I noticed a weird taste. Upon investigation, I found a small caterpillar wedged inside the straw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 302

You deserved it 4 332

By browngirl - 29/09/2013 04:16 - Canada - Vernon

Today, at work, a lady came in to have her glasses fixed. When she opened her case, an earwig crawled out. Instead of trying to kill it, she just left it and watched as it crawled over my desk and behind my computer. I later found the earwig in my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 865

You deserved it 4 972

Yucky!

By theapplesleader - 23/12/2019 03:00 - United States - Washington

Today, I picked my dog up and nibbled her ear. On the tip of her ear was a large tick, which burst, sending blood into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 570

You deserved it 3 827

Added protein

By Anonymous - 10/02/2021 00:30

Today, I was drinking lemon juice through a straw. After finishing half of the drink, I noticed there was a cockroach in my straw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 949

You deserved it 192

By idiot - 24/01/2013 19:53 - Australia - Newcastle

Today, I took a swig of lemonade from my cup, only to feel something hard in my mouth. Thinking it was a roach or something, I freaked out and spat out the drink. I doused my laptop and soaked myself in the process, only to find out it was a small ice-cube. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 568

You deserved it 40 303

By Anonymous - 07/02/2014 18:51 - Mayotte - Mamoudzou

Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 287

You deserved it 3 663

Next

Top comments

Allie614032 34

Wednesday 2 August 2017 7:23

Well... at least you didn't swallow it.

extremereviews 26

Wednesday 2 August 2017 15:02

@RichardPencil, are you on here 24/7? Every FML I look at your in the first 3 comments

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Wednesday 2 August 2017 5:07

Was it “Never Gonna Let You Go?” When I get that earwig, I can hardly spit hard enough to get rid of it. Wait! It’s earworm, not earwig. Nvm. You’ve been Rick-rolled!

extremereviews 26

Wednesday 2 August 2017 15:02

@RichardPencil, are you on here 24/7? Every FML I look at your in the first 3 comments

Thor1012 28

Wednesday 2 August 2017 18:19

literally think the same...

jfsiv 17

Thursday 3 August 2017 3:24

At least he's not davecross...

HanBanana15 9

Thursday 3 August 2017 5:39

Occasionally, you're funny, but now you're trying too hard.

Lalala579121 27

Thursday 3 August 2017 11:17

Nah, we've been Richard-roll'd.

Marlon4136 4

Saturday 5 August 2017 4:07

The title of the song is "Never Gonna Give You Up." You just Great Valued an iconic Internet trope.

Allie614032 34

Wednesday 2 August 2017 7:23

Well... at least you didn't swallow it.

gobiteme2 34

Wednesday 2 August 2017 7:48

Protein

pjsr 32

Wednesday 2 August 2017 22:36

A very drunk earwig

MitiMiki 16

Thursday 3 August 2017 23:59

Pro tip - Be civilized and always pour your beer into a glass. Not only does doing so prevent the accidental consumption of things other than beer, it will also make your beer taste much better by releasing the nitrogen and subsequently the bouquet of the brew. Remember, you taste with your eyes and nose just as much as you do your mouth!

LudA9844 11

Friday 4 August 2017 3:40

I guess it was a ....beerwig

mariah hates her life 12

Friday 4 August 2017 7:27

hey, at least I didn't bite you. That would have been painful

Neror 13

Friday 4 August 2017 12:40

A beerwig?

Marlon4136 4

Saturday 5 August 2017 4:08

The only thing you should feel when drinking a beer is the buzz. That sucks, man.

Mozelle123 10

Sunday 6 August 2017 22:14

Pretty sure u can sue!!

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The Top

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 711

You deserved it 117

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I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 110

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I agree, your life sucks 730

You deserved it 159

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I agree, your life sucks 1 010

You deserved it 84

Today, I went to a doctor's appointment to figure out why I've suddenly started going deaf. As it turns out, for some reason my ears now produce wax at an alarmingly fast rate. "Enough to make an entire candle before long if you save it up," the doctor said when she cleared them out. I guess this is my life now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 466

You deserved it 76

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend's crazy ex, who let herself in with her old key. She screamed at me to get out of "her" bed, snatched "her" blanket off of my body, and finally dragged the bed itself out the door. I was still in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 623

You deserved it 3 679