By strangely - 25/07/2015 00:12 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I had to imagine myself savagely beating my cat to death, just to stop myself from getting a boner while a girl laid her head in my lap. FML
I agree, your life sucks 35 334
You deserved it 6 294

Same thing different taste

Top comments

euphoricness 28

I don't think thinking of pussy will help your cause.


What if that had the opposite effect.

Then her noticing his boner should be the least of his worries. And it would be extremely awkward when he gets home to see his cat.

I think most guys can affirm that they have had to do things like that from time to time to keep from getting a boner. Sometimes, it's the only way to keep from an extremely awkward situation.

imkool136 22

I personally let them see, or feel, what they're getting themselves into. Show yourself... Unless you know nothing good will happen

Exactly #60! It's a compliment. He should have just let it happen.It's his body's way of saying "Hey you're hot and you should move your head three inches to the right".

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imkool136 22

EXACTLY!!!! Then just move up and down a bit... Who knows? Lol

You have given me the confidence I need in life. Thank you

Well, ive never gone to that extreme, but yes i have had to imagine scary things..*shudder*

Badkarma4u 17

Sorry man, If a girl is putting her head in my lap she has to know two things 1 a dick lives there. 2 I like her. If shes still willing to put her head there. Whatever happens roll with it. Shes not stupid.

euphoricness 28

I don't think thinking of pussy will help your cause.

Looks like you had quite the CATastrophe on your hands

the only fire involved in any pun is when you set that person on fire for making one.

I liked the pun in general. Your over emphasis on CAT however is probably why you're getting down voted. Just my opinion.

Why the **** was this downvoted? **** all you guys.

sethsmith11 21

I didn't find the pun funny, but #5 follow up after being down voted was hilarious

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BaconBomb2001 6

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we should erect a statue in honor of this guy.

You guys must have thought long and hard to cum up with these puns.

PePziNL 20

These comments are golden, I'll have to write some of them down. Does somebody know where my penis?

I jacked it yesterday so I could write notes in my dicktionary.

SalsaVerdeDonut 22

We've all been there. Though, I never had to think of something like savagely beating my pet to death to refrain from getting a boner. Whatever helps I guess.

should have destroyed her pussy instead of your own!

cheshirecat13242 32

That's an interesting method.. I expected the FML to end with "..but it had an opposite effect."