Sarah
Today, I had the mole on my neck removed. By my pet bird. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
boreed
United States
Today, I finally got an unsightly mole on my face removed. While I was shaving. FML
No Nip
Today, I was making breakfast with my parrot on my shoulder. He was excited about the food, and in his rush to climb down to the counter, bit through my nipple. I had to get stitches. FML
nomorepetbird
United States
Today, my pet bird died. He had caught some illness and had been extremely sick for the past few days. He didn't die from the illness though. My dog ate him. FML
Anonymous
Australia
New creepypasta just dropped
Today, I was sick in bed with a nasty flu. It was also the day my bird was eaten by an animal that had silently burrowed into the cage while I was recovering. FML
Twitchy
Bahamas
Today, I watched a cat pounce on a small bird and rip it to shreds, feather by feather. It wouldn't have been any worse than mildly disturbing, had I not just spent the last 4 weeks nursing the bird back to health from a broken wing. FML
anonymous
United States
Today, my boyfriend told me there was a tick on my shoulder and that he would remove it so I shouldn't worry. After about a half hour, lots of blood, and a ton of pain, he told me it was just a mole. FML
birdsterrifyme
This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff
Sikeston, United States
Face your fears!
Today, I decided to confront my fear of birds when my friend's pet bird was walking up to me. He got on my arm, climbed up, and attacked my face. FML
Olive14
Today, I was caring for a bird that had flown into my window. I thought the poor thing wouldn't make it, when it shit in my hand, flew into my neck, then around my living room for ages before I could manage to get it out of the window. FML
craphanded
This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff
United Kingdom
You're welcome…
Today, I saved a bird from being run over as it lay in the middle of the road. Thinking it had a broken wing or something, I started carrying it home, intending to take it to the vet later. It crapped in my hand and flew away. FML
flipnazn
United States
Today, my dog was scooped up by an owl. FML
Top comments
RichardPencil 32
You should know that birds attack small mammals like mice, chipmunks and moles. This one is on you since you let your pet mole run around on your neck.
Skydome6666 6
that's very nice of your bird to save you trip to the drs to get it removed. treat your bird to a romantic candle lit dinner.
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Comments (3)
Skydome6666 6
that's very nice of your bird to save you trip to the drs to get it removed. treat your bird to a romantic candle lit dinner.
RichardPencil 32
You should know that birds attack small mammals like mice, chipmunks and moles. This one is on you since you let your pet mole run around on your neck.
protoskore 27
ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch