Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I got into an accident and my car was totaled. My friends then took me out to a bar for a drink to make me feel better. It appears that the police officer I'd spoken to had kept my I.D. by mistake and I couldn't get into the bar. FML
Today, I went to a party to see my crush. He offered me a drink and I declined telling him that I don't drink because alcohol makes people act stupid and crash their cars. He then saw me back into a car parked on the street and shatter my backlights as I reversed from the driveway to go home. FML
Today, I met a girl at a bar. After buying her a few drinks, we decided to head back to her place. Not wanting to leave either of our cars, I followed her home. While driving, she sent me text because she missed her exit. I tried to text her back something witty and instead rear ended her. FML
Today, I was drunk and crashed on my friend's couch to sober up. On the drive home, a cop pulled me over for seemingly no reason. He kept asking if I had been drinking, to which I answered no. Finally, he told me to look in the mirror. My friends had written all over my face while I slept. FML
Today, I went to a bar with a close friend. She got drunk and was feeling sick, so I carried her to my car to take her to her house. Some stranger accused me of drugging her and tackled me with her in my arms. She threw up on me, and he took off running without an apology. FML
Today, I tried to keep a drunk girl from driving by holding her keys, but she had a spare set in her purse. She hit me with her car when I was walking home. FML
Today, I met a really nice girl at a club. One thing led to another, and she told me to meet her out front in 5 minutes. I was so drunk that I stumbled into the restroom instead, then curled up on the floor crying in despair when I realized my mistake. FML
Today, my friend and his girlfriend got in a fight while drunk and he started walking home. While driving around looking for him, I accidentally hit him with my car. FML
Today, I decided to be responsible and call a cab to take my drunk ass home from the bar. As I climbed into the cab, I was quickly pulled back out and had the shit beaten out of me by a group of drunk guys who thought they needed the ride more. The police soon arrived and arrested us all. FML
Today, I woke up after I had gotten shitfaced, and tossed out of bars by bouncers several times. I even had pictures of my face circulated to other bars not to be served. I then met a woman I almost smoked crack with, and spent the rest of the night following her while she asked random homeless people for free crack. FML
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Top comments
juststephhere 23
Well now you know to not trust strangers with your vehicle. Next time just call a cab...
patrickeli 15
Serves you right for getting overly drunk and trusting a stranger.
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Comments (63)
just1n12 18
Weren't you in the passenger seat? That would be an indication that you weren't responsible for the accident.
tray623 7
Cops know that people will switch seats to try to trick them into thinking they were not driving. If there is only one person in the vehicle and the keys are there they assume you were driving, even if they are not in the ignition. But I agree that there are others ways to prove he wasn't driving. YDi it for not being responsible and calling a cab or tow truck, but FYL because she ditched you. That sucks.
demonfacee 14
Didn't you learn about stranger danger as a child?
bsums203 13
Shouldnt be too hard to appeal, just do it now and don't wait or the security footage will be deleted. You should be on bar footage, parking lot footage, and street camera footage. Shouldn't be hard to tell two people were in the car and she left with you.
wheresmymary 22
Stranger danger
jeragonm 15
Shouldn't have been a moron. You should have called a cab. Instead, you were stupid for getting so drunk that you thought that was a GREAT idea, and you payed the price. That's karma
xluciferx666 21
Have you tried hiring the A-Team?
[email protected] 14
Next time get a dash cam for your car you'll be thanking me later.
[email protected] 14
wow what's up with down votes its a smart thing to have in your car. you can use the footage to use in court how was this a bad suggested.
countryb_cth 38
I am pretty sure that the reason you were down voted is because, how would anyone see the girl in the drivers seat when a dash cam faces the road and not the inside of the car. That's just my guess.
vcapelo 19
Fingerprints maybe?
SMHsohard 22
Number 1, there are most likely numerous prints on and in his car. Number 2, unless the owners of those prints have a record, or are bonded, they aren't going to show up in any data base. It isn't as easy as Garcia makes it seem every week.
missbrit818 20
Worst first date ever
loudNblunt 4
The situation is completely ****** up. But be smart about it. She must have left some fingerprints on the steering wheel or any other surface of your car. Request a check for fingerprints and that will give you some solid evidence.. And they'll be able to track her down. Good luck!