Today, I got a phone call out of the blue from a young man, who screamed that he was going to kill me for sleeping with his fiancée. I told him I am a 49-year-old man who hasn't been laid since my wife passed away, four years ago. He stammered, shouted "Well she was a slut too" and hung up. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, when I woke up I checked my phone for messages, only to hear a woman screaming that I have been sleeping with her husband and that she is sending her 'people' after me. I have never met said husband. I panicked for hours, only to receive a call telling me she had dialed the wrong number. FML
Today, I received a phone call from the number of a "single" guy I met online. It was his wife, who is three months pregnant. She threatened to kick my ass. FML
Today, I received a random phone call from an unknown number. Three times. After the third time, the person started yelling at me viciously. Then I suddenly heard a different voice, saying, "Terribly sorry, sir. My poor sister has dementia and thinks you're her husband. Her dead husband, I might add." FML
Today, I got a call from the guy I have been seeing. I wasn't him. It was his wife wondering why I have her husband's number. FML
Today, I called back a number I'd recently missed a call from. To my surprise, it was my boyfriend's fiancée's number. I've been with him four years, he's been with her for six. Turns out, not only is he a cheating jerk, but technically I'M the other woman. FML
Today, my "friend" thought it'd be absolutely hilarious to use my phone to text my girlfriend, bragging that I'd found a new "slampiece" and that she's "fukcin dumpd". Now I'm single, her dad keeps making threatening calls to me, and nobody will even listen to my side of the story. FML
Today, I had the crap beaten out of me by a woman in the street, who accused me of sleeping with her husband. I still don't know who she or her husband are, and I'm still a virgin. FML
Today, I went to the market to buy some groceries. Before I got even half-way home, a guy stormed toward me, pulled what looked like a knife, and chased me around the block while screaming that he'd kill me for sleeping with his wife. Nope, still a 15-year-old virgin here. FML
Today, a 65-ish year-old man told me that he's married and not supposed to look at other women, but that I tempt him. All while sitting next to his wife, who then told me I was going to hell. FML
Today, I thought my online boyfriend was calling me, so the first line I said was "Hey, Baby." His wife answered with, "This is Jenny. Who's this?" After speaking for thirty minutes, I found out he's married, fifty-eight, and has two kids. I'm seventeen. FML
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Top comments
williamcarter93 13
Poor OP. Sorry your wife had to die so relatively early.
Larawk 8
Tweet his number. I'm sure you could get a bunch of kids to prank call him. Revenge is sweet
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Comments (135)
Neligee 9
Don't let his negative comments affect you :/. Live for your wife and yourself. She's within you.
RKD 23
Sorry, to hear, Op, if you have his number trapped report him-threats are illegal-I wouldn't have him put in jail but have a record made of it with the police and make him apologize-on the other hand, he was probably just a drunken douche and his girl slept with someone else because of that reason-he only insulted your wife because he didn't have anyone else to lash out at-he is just a horse's ass and will get what's coming to him-I would just forget about it and get my number changed if it happens again!
LittleGreenPaola 23
I'm sorry for your wife, but you shouldn't have told anything about your personal life to an unknown person who had just insulted you.
happyconverse 10
I am so sorry that happened!! That guy was totally out of line
HEIDIBELLA 8
Sorry for your loss dude
tomiller64 0
Well a certain op needs to kick someones ass
fleurie 6
((hugs))
hateevryone 15
Sorry for your loss. I hate prank callers.
mattanator 2
Sorry about your wife dude that sucks a lot
isamisis 9
My reply is always: "I Dare You"