Today, I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around, I said, "Hey sexy are you alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She responded with, "Hey, yeah he is at work - did you get a new number?" FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Today, my boyfriend texted me saying, "I can come over today. She thinks I've got work." I think he had the wrong number. FML
Kinda sus
Today, after my husband's phone buzzed like crazy all morning, I decided to pick it up and see what all the fuss was about. He had three new picture messages from his "boss", naked and strapped to a chair with the caption, "Are you still coming over tonight?" We've been married for nine years and have two children. FML
Unknown number
Today, I gave my phone number to a guy at the movie theatre. I was excited to receive a text a few minutes later, sure enough when I unlocked my phone I had received a message from an unknown number. It was his girlfriend. FML
Today, I went and bought my wife a new cell phone for a Christmas present. She called me five minutes later saying she got a notification e-mail thanking her for her purchase. FML
Lonely, so lonely…
Today, to get my mind off being single, I texted some friends. The first one was going out tonight to work things out with her ex, the second told me about his amazing new girlfriend, and the third replied an hour later with, "Sorry, I was having sex when you texted me." FML
Sorry Noah
Today, I got an iPhone, I was excited and because I have a new number, I wanted to mess with my girlfriend a little. I started sending her provocative messages, and after 4 or 5 of them, I discovered I had entered her number wrong and was talking dirty to a man named Noah. FML
Manipulation
Today, I checked my husband's phone, as mine was dead. When I opened it, I saw a text conversation with his friend. He recently said, "Man you just gotta ignore your wife more. I stopped paying so much attention to mine and next thing I knew she was all over me, it's awesome." FML
Today, I got a call from the guy I have been seeing. I wasn't him. It was his wife wondering why I have her husband's number. FML
Busted
Today, my girlfriend text me and told me to do something sexy because she was going to FaceTime me. I eagerly dropped my pants and started stroking it to get ready for her. As soon as I opened her call, she was standing with my wife. I literally got caught with my dick in my hand. FML
Today, my husband returned from being away for two weeks. I eagerly got myself ready and sent him a risqué picture so he would come to bed. An hour later, he's on the couch playing Xbox with the message already seen. FML
Top comments
grumpy94533 11
:( ouch. Sorry
micha090 21
Dump the bitch OP. You deserve better.
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Comments (182)
czeptoks 8
that's terrible. i feel sorry for you mate
Omnomnymous 10
Lucy!! You have some 'splainin' to do!!
nmrg 10
Eek, I wonder why she's been cheating on you.
HerRoyalDykeness 5
that gta hurt... kick that ***** to the curb!
cookie1207 19
Dumb that bitch!
Raylosophy 10
Maybe she knew it was you and decided to "play around"....probably not.
KingreX32 21
well shit.
fuck_my_life_374 2
She could have been just joking around but prob not sorry OP.
Curlytwirly22 17
Keep texting her until you get enough proof for court then sue the bitch for everything she's got then tell her to go kill herself then sue the guy she's cheating on you with and tell him to kill himself
AloysiusWeasley 15
I'd say playing along until you get enough proof would be enough. Anything else and you're not going to get near as much sympathy in the divorce court...
pwnman 33
Just say that you found someone who is more attractive then her and say your going to call a lawyer for divorce...