unknown
United States
Today, I got a call from my daughter's school saying that she had beat someone up. She's 4. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
DocShadow
New York, United States
Today, my 4-year-old daughter stood up to a bully in the mall. I was the one who was getting bullied. FML
angry mama
The Headmaster Ritual
Today, while picking my daughter up from school, I saw her being beaten by two boys while the teacher stood there doing nothing. I ran to help, but then she pushed one of the boys off her. The teacher then pulled her away, yelled at her and then yelled at me for "not raising my kid right." FML
crzyry
Canada
Today, my four-year-old daughter called me by her mom's new boyfriend's name. Three different times. FML
mama bear
Fight Club Penguin
Today, I punched an older woman in the face. I only hit her after she grabbed my 4-year-old daughter and told her to, "stop dancing like a whore!" My daughter was so terrified, she peed her pants. FML
imnotastranger
Today, I was teaching my 4 year-old daughter about "stranger danger" and how to deal with it. Later that day, we went out and since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming "STRANGER DANGER!" A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML
strayking
Rough school
Today, my daughter admitted that she doesn’t have any friends at her elementary school. When I asked her why, she said it was because whenever she talks to any of the other kids, she gets punched in the face. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML
Anonymous
United States
Kids will be kids
Today, I learned my son has been picking on a girl he has a crush on. He apparently went too far, because she finally snapped and beat him up at recess. The teacher, who knew about this from the beginning and actively did nothing, is trying to throw me under the bus for being oblivious to my son's behavior. FML
Anonymous
New Zealand
Today, my daughter came up to me crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she told me that she had a fight with her imaginary boyfriend. She's 16. I raised this child. FML
Anonymous
Whack-a-Mole
Today, I had to pick my daughter up from pre-school because she repeatedly hit another kid with a stick. Apparently, my parents have been letting her watch violent action movies again. FML
Top comments
BriBeHyper 2
What a badass.
RA661 8
Sign 'er up for boxing!
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Comments (202)
enonymous 9
Mortal Kombat: Playground. Coming in 2012 Her fatality is a boot to the nuts. Her animality is a stuffed Teddy bear
bettyc4 26
BEST COMMENT EVER!!!!!!!!!!
pixelebrate 0
12- Sir I believe that is a win.
dezycupcake 0
I meant to thumbs up your comment :O
Chigagigaroo 0
WORST COMMENT EVER!
lexilope 6
The other kid must have had it coming. She probably stole your daughters crayons or some crazy shit like that.
bdair 1
I guess shes gonna wear the pants in the house when she gets married huh ?
mea_iloveskiing 26
Rocky Balboa jr. :)
JTthePurpleNinja 5
WILSON !!! :D
Freeze_fml 17
Parenting success.
markrs 0
She was probably playing Bop It and got frustrated with it and attacked the nearest kid. I would have.
americiato 2
hardcore toddler
pondermuse 5
Cheeky little shit! Although she must have had probable cause. No fyl.
Sabraynay 10
I'd be someone up if they stole my crayons too. No one touches my crayons. No one.
Sabraynay 10
*beat, my bad.
Wreckless_fml 6
You scare me a little :c
WordSmyth 2
Stole some crayons, like a boss Chewed 'em up, like a boss Threw 'em on the ground, like a boss, Pulled the teachers hair, like a boss Punched a kid in the ear, like a boss I'm 4 years old, such a boss...
mellylicious 8
Good for her! She stood up for herself! You should be proud!