Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend that I couldn't believe this happened, he said, "I'm not going to lie, I didn't always pull out fast." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend, his response was, "I'll start watching pregnant porn to build up an attraction to it." FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He went outside for a "breather" and never came back. FML
Today, when my boyfriend came home, I was crying and told him I was pregnant. His immediate response was, "Awesome! Pregnant girls are always horny and we won't need protection for the next few months!" FML
Today, I found out I was pregnant. I told my boyfriend, who held me and promised it'd be alright, and he'd never leave me. One sandwich later, he'd forgotten about the whole thing, and dumped me when I reminded him. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend of 2 years that I was pregnant. His response? "That's neat. But we can still have sex, right?" FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I’m pregnant. He broke down crying because his mother is going to be so mad at him. He’s in his 30’s and we've lived together for over 4 years, it’s not like it was a drunken mistake, it just happened naturally. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. Instead of being happy, he freaked out, then told me I was trying to "trap" him. We've been together for 12 years, and trying for 3. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend of 4 years that I'm pregnant. He suggested we get a paternity test done. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend’s other girlfriend is pregnant. He doesn’t know that I know. A few days ago he told me that he couldn't have a baby with anyone. She has to be the right one, I guess I wasn’t. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Ami8919 0
YDI for not using proper contraception!! No sympathy!!
hatcher 0
pulling out doesn't work. I guess sex-ed in Utah still doesn't work either.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (400)
Ravenite 0
Nope. no sympathy. You got screwed.
12frisbees 0
electrikpunk 0
YDI for using the pull-out method, ya idiot.
Zero2Sixty 0
YOU DESERVE IT FOR GETTING KNOCKED UP WITH OUT A CONDOM ! ! !
__ColoradoSunris 0
as opposed to getting what, knocked up with a condom? :S but you're right. YDI.
aback 5
People who "pull out" are called parents. Educate yourself so you don't have a ton of kids before you're 16.
crazy_cat_lady24 0
Hahaha, agreed. In this case they are called a gullible mother and an asshole father. But the father probably won't be around for long. A guy who won't take responsibility in (not) impregnating his girlfriend probably won't take responsibility for her child. Good luck being a single mom, OP. Wow, you Americans really need to do something about your sex ed. In the Netherlands we have proper sex ed and nobody uses the pulling out method here. In the US the teen pregnancy rate is more than 10x higher than in the Netherlands. The facts speak for themselves in this case, I think.
letitbe56 0
Agreed! Better sex-ed = lower rate of unwanted pregnancies = lower rates of abortion, child abuse, crime, etc. You'd think liberals and conservatives alike would be all over this!
ihatestupidppl 0
#127, usually I hate when people bring up the whole "America vs (other countries)" argument up, but in this case, you are absolutely correct. I mean really, pro-abstinence only education?! Good job, America. Once, I was forced to teach pro-abstinence to a group of young girls. (I was an assistant teacher at a non-profit and had no say in which classes I had to teach). We were allowed to teach them how sex works and the biology of conception, but NOTHING about contraception, ONLY abstinence. Which, you know, is like 100% effective. Just look at Bristol Palin! Teenagers are going to do what they're going to do, its PATHETIC that America wants to hide behind the idea of "lets just tell them not to do it and pray that they listen to us".
Mulada 0
Doesn't Netherlands have a high rate of human trafficking?
Tubasaurus 0
and that has to do with sex-ed how?
sickinlove13 0
127, "In the Netherlands we have proper sex ed and nobody uses the pulling out method here. " Nobody uses the pull out method there? I highly doubt that and I'm sure you don't know everybody.
deamer 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Pulling out actually does work if you have an intelligent boyfriend. I've been doing it for 5 years and have never gotten anyone pregnant.
my_fml_account 2
maybe you're infertile.
LoVe_Me_fml 0
Agreed....if you have someone who is responsible and knows what the hell they are doing it doesn't always lead to a baby. I'm going on 3 years and do not have a kid
purple_people 0
I did this for 3 years too. IMO, it's a bad idea. I've been on BC ever since. At least I don't have to worry every month. YDI to OP.
christina201288 6
or perhaps you can't.
joeyl1990 28
something is probably wromg with your seed
ridgie 0
YDI for not using contraception, but FY child's life for being conceived by mistake. Good luck to you, though.
CDS09 0
what #8 said.... Cheapness is a bitch, use a condom, slap your boyfriend, he is just as much at fault.
ctc9 0
Really? The pulloutmethod? You can get pregnant even if he pulls out then has to jerkoff to finish.
Jaguaress 2
Pulling out only works some of the time - the rest of the time, you're pregnant. (You do know that in rare cases, even heavy petting can cause pregnancy, if the precum gets inside the ******, like with fingers.) Stop being stupid and use a condom. And any girl who would let a guy do the "pulling out method" isn't protecting herself. Use a condom always, and then have another form of birth control as well: spermicidal foam, birth control pill, sponge, or diaphragm. (I'm assuming you're too young for the IUD.) Educate yourself. Please, if you don't want this child or an abortion, put it up for adoption asap so that it will have good parents because, obviously, you're too naive.
PTERONOPHOBIA 0
people still say "heavy petting" ?
skullbuster 0
What is this, a 1970's grotto party at the Playboy Mansion? "Heavy Petting" indeed!!! HAHAHAHAHA...
Hugorgy 0
The sponge is banned in the U.S. because of it's high failure rate. I learned that in Life Skills and Relationships class my freshman year of high school four years ago.
Beej_fml 0
It was unbanned a few years ago! Keep updating yourself. (But it still DOES have a higher failure rate than other forms like condoms, the pill, etc.) My advice--GET ON THE PILL!!!
fed_up_thespian 9
yeah, not sure when that happened, but its back on the market and my bc pills recommend it as a viable backup method. i use both together, personally, so i have no worries.
SimpleSimon 0
Are you using any sort of birth control? If not, you're simply stupid. Have your child adopted so it doesn't grow up to be a burden on society as well. If you are, then I genuinely do feel for you, you were unlucky and the exception to the rule