Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend that I couldn't believe this happened, he said, "I'm not going to lie, I didn't always pull out fast." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend, his response was, "I'll start watching pregnant porn to build up an attraction to it." FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He went outside for a "breather" and never came back. FML
Today, when my boyfriend came home, I was crying and told him I was pregnant. His immediate response was, "Awesome! Pregnant girls are always horny and we won't need protection for the next few months!" FML
Today, I found out I was pregnant. I told my boyfriend, who held me and promised it'd be alright, and he'd never leave me. One sandwich later, he'd forgotten about the whole thing, and dumped me when I reminded him. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend of 2 years that I was pregnant. His response? "That's neat. But we can still have sex, right?" FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I’m pregnant. He broke down crying because his mother is going to be so mad at him. He’s in his 30’s and we've lived together for over 4 years, it’s not like it was a drunken mistake, it just happened naturally. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. Instead of being happy, he freaked out, then told me I was trying to "trap" him. We've been together for 12 years, and trying for 3. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend of 4 years that I'm pregnant. He suggested we get a paternity test done. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend’s other girlfriend is pregnant. He doesn’t know that I know. A few days ago he told me that he couldn't have a baby with anyone. She has to be the right one, I guess I wasn’t. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
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Top comments
Ami8919 0
YDI for not using proper contraception!! No sympathy!!
hatcher 0
pulling out doesn't work. I guess sex-ed in Utah still doesn't work either.
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Comments (400)
AntiChrist7 0
that's going to be a retarded baby, because the parents are absolute morons. pulling out is about the unsafest method there is. YDI
rockonCB4 0
WTF! Pulling out isn't birth control! you deserved that, dumbass!
blueknight1st 26
Your kidding right? You were using the pullout method and you can't understand how this happened? The United States' education system is definitely failing us. Do the world a favor and don't have anymore kids. That kid deserves smarter parents than the two of you.
maddog_fml 0
OP: And then I said "Sorry dear, I'm not going to lie to you, it's NOT yours"
macc55 2
**** your life for having a child? why
skullbuster 0
I....don't....even....know....where....to....begin (insert headshaking and finger waggling here). Pre-cum, this - wives tales, that - pull out effectiveness - blah blah blah. It's all a blur because I just can't get past the pity and utter confusion I feel, OP, when I consider you, your boyfriend, your unborn child, your parents. Your lives are changing here, all because you couldn't pop a pill, or have your boyfriend stick his dick in some latex before he stuck it in you... did you at least get an ****** out of this mess (we know he did)? But, really, where is "United Methodist Bitch" and her cadre of bible beaters to knock down all these contraception talkers? And where are the gaggle of health care "professionals" who love to offer free medical advice in the comments section? And this FML would not be complete without the self-admitted members of the bar who offer us their legal opinions on what lawsuit OP should pursue??? The world has been upended here!
cxal_fml 0
The united methodists have nothing against birth control. Its the catholics who insist you can't use condoms/birth control. You won't find a Methodist against condoms, because from a religious standpoint they aren't against using any form of contraception. :D
skullbuster 0
Oh, my friend United Methodist Bitch just gets wet when I mention her in my posts, that's all!
loverslanex3 0
I agree with the majority. YDI. Maybe you should use a condom next time.
Melephant_fml 0
Two words: Birth control.
tipsy337 0
So your baby might be retarded if he takes after his father. Let's hope he takes after you
skullbuster 0
Yeah, because she isn't ******* retarded? These are two dumb people, who are probably too young to be having sex anyway...
horsiigurl 0
its called condoms and birth control pills and YDI for not going on the pill, even if you thought he pulled out before he let out the sperms you should still go on the pill, this is why they invented the pill, so kids dont need to live a life as a mistake!