Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend that I couldn't believe this happened, he said, "I'm not going to lie, I didn't always pull out fast." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend, his response was, "I'll start watching pregnant porn to build up an attraction to it." FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He went outside for a "breather" and never came back. FML
Today, when my boyfriend came home, I was crying and told him I was pregnant. His immediate response was, "Awesome! Pregnant girls are always horny and we won't need protection for the next few months!" FML
Today, I found out I was pregnant. I told my boyfriend, who held me and promised it'd be alright, and he'd never leave me. One sandwich later, he'd forgotten about the whole thing, and dumped me when I reminded him. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend of 2 years that I was pregnant. His response? "That's neat. But we can still have sex, right?" FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I’m pregnant. He broke down crying because his mother is going to be so mad at him. He’s in his 30’s and we've lived together for over 4 years, it’s not like it was a drunken mistake, it just happened naturally. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. Instead of being happy, he freaked out, then told me I was trying to "trap" him. We've been together for 12 years, and trying for 3. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend of 4 years that I'm pregnant. He suggested we get a paternity test done. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend’s other girlfriend is pregnant. He doesn’t know that I know. A few days ago he told me that he couldn't have a baby with anyone. She has to be the right one, I guess I wasn’t. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
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Top comments
Ami8919 0
YDI for not using proper contraception!! No sympathy!!
hatcher 0
pulling out doesn't work. I guess sex-ed in Utah still doesn't work either.
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Comments (400)
crampy 0
You deserve it for not using protection.
Nightfallz 0
ydi. how can you not believe it happened ehen you obviously were not using protection. I'm sure you won't believe it when you have HIV next time.
fxdxhk90 0
When are all of the idiots on this planet going to learn that pull outs don't work?
kaelendra 0
I wouldn't suggest staying with him if you thought you guys were using condoms.... he's none too bright and can provide child support while elsewheere.
Prawn_fml 2
It does take a while for your body to stabilize back... If you don't want more kids, you might want to start on contraceptives again soon, cause you might just have been lucky so far, but that won't keep up forever. There are alternatives though, one or both of you could get sterilized, or your spouse could use the contraceptives.
loltreated 0
While I do think the OP should have used a more effective form of protection, I do not think she should get it aborted, and I don't think she needs all of you assholes repeatedly telling her she's a moron and a disgrace to the world. You know who deserves to be talked down to? Child molesters. You want to make someone feel like shit for the choices they made? Go to a prison and talk to someone who's murdered someone else. The OP and her boyfriend might have been ignorant, but I am quite sure she's figured this out, and for her to have to hear over and over and over, from people she doesn't even know, what she SHOULD have done...well, that is utter bullshit. Good luck with your baby, OP. I hope you decide to let it live, one way or another, and I hope your boyfriend shows a bit more promise.
skullbuster 0
The child molesters and murderers didn't post anything about their exploits here on FML and I don't feel like driving out to the prison, but thanks for the suggestion. In the meantime, I know for me, what really got me here - and the reason DUMB **** keeps flashing in my mind when I think of the OP - is the fact that not only is she suggesting that "pulling out" was an effective way to prevent the pregnancy to begin with, but that the boyfriend somehow ****** her over by not "pulling out fast" when they were going at it. If she had said: "Today, I found out I am pregnant because I actually believed that the pull-out method was effective birth control, FML" I could empathize a little more because there is some sense of understanding that this dumb bitch is responsible for her pregnancy (as is the dipshit boyfriend). Now, I am not Dr. Phil writing incognito here so do not assume you are benefiting from the opinion and counsel of someone of that caliber, but this young moron will be a mother soon - or she will be making the hike to the nearest abortion clinic - and either way, that is a great deal more than I think this mental midget and her horny boyfriend are capable of coping with. And, really, to all you amateur sex-ed teachers and doctors out there, shove your statistics up your ass. Sex ed classes are telling these kids at 10/11 years old that pulling out does not work...and looky loo...it didn't!!!!! And hell, in Utah, they are probably telling these kids that the semen will burn like acid if it touches their skin - that is, unless they hook up at 8 years old with a local 90 year-old "Profit", become wife #28, and sex him up - because that is god's will!
waterynuggets 0
Dr Phil is a tv star, that's about it loll.
madasahatter 0
Try using condoms next time. And please don't abort it. Your baby probably has fingernails lol
dancin303 0
finger nails well in that case let it live? like wtf. so do lots of animals and people find it okay to kill those all the time when they were already born. sooooo. lame excuse.
boatkicker 5
It's a joke from teh movie Juno
mcsnelly 5
#180 was talking about something that happened in the movie Juno. She was about to go get an abortion and a classmate outside the clinic told her the baby would already have fingernails and then she rethought it because she didn't think it was right to kill the baby anymore.
eggbrtshootsfire 0
I guess that's what happens when you put your pregnancy status in the hands of a man who's about to ******. Good job champ
MadeOfAwesome 1
Use a ******* condom and birth control!! Is it really that difficult?? YDI for believing that "pulling out" actually works >_>
PimpDaddyT 0
wow I think I'll save this for my daughter to show her what stupidity gets you once you become sexually active