Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband reacted by going out and smoking weed, then getting completely shitfaced, and having his buddies drag his nearly-comatose carcass back home from a strip club. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He seemed thrilled, and went to buy some wine to celebrate. He left 11 hours ago and won't come back. FML
Today, I found out I’m pregnant and got excited. We’d never discussed kids before since we’ve only been dating a year, but I was so happy… until I told him, and his face just fell. I left after he drank himself unconscious and I’m now at my mum's house FML
Today, I'm found out I'm pregnant. My husband and I spoke at length about how we were going to handle things, which included him "forbidding" me from having an epidural, because he doesn't want our baby to "come out addicted to drugs." FML
Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML
Today, while trying to have a serious conversation with my husband about his drug use over text, he came home. Drunk. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He went outside for a "breather" and never came back. FML
Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. I also found out that the dad has a fiancée. FML
Today, I decided to surprise my husband by bringing home a case of beer and renting us a porno. He decided to surprise me by telling me he was leaving me for his pregnant girlfriend. FML
Today, I found out my husband is having a baby. Too bad I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, and since I found out that I'm pregnant, I've been sober. I used to smoke weed to help with me depression and anxiety, but now I can't even take prescription medicine for it. I'm about to throw hands at this point. FML
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Top comments
Lioness8197 18
You really picked a winner:) Good luck and congrats!
elk21dbm 18
Congratulations on the baby!
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Comments (153)
Jordanln97 9
Beat the living shit out of him and blame your hormones. Problem solved!
Smerf2 4
That'll be a good story to tell at your child's 21st
Denny1 15
Good times
spacetravel 1
I really don't get the 'last hoorah' everybody likes to talk about. If you have that mentality, you are not ready to be a father let alone commitment. Congrats on the baby but it seems like your life is going to get harder and sadder from here on...
Osiris094 4
That's why we invented condoms.
sunkissedluster 20
oh stfu its just a lil weed, god
ohjoy15 33
No sympathy from me. You let this guy become the father your child. 110% YDI.
Zebediabolical 45
Where I come from, this is called 'Celebration!'
_charliebrown_ 3
Lady I am sorry. Your husbans a loser. He should have been celebrating with you!
janro72 10
what kind of man you married??