Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband reacted by going out and smoking weed, then getting completely shitfaced, and having his buddies drag his nearly-comatose carcass back home from a strip club. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Great, I guess
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He seemed thrilled, and went to buy some wine to celebrate. He left 11 hours ago and won't come back. FML
Short-lived
Today, I found out I’m pregnant and got excited. We’d never discussed kids before since we’ve only been dating a year, but I was so happy… until I told him, and his face just fell. I left after he drank himself unconscious and I’m now at my mum's house FML
Prevention
Today, I'm found out I'm pregnant. My husband and I spoke at length about how we were going to handle things, which included him "forbidding" me from having an epidural, because he doesn't want our baby to "come out addicted to drugs." FML
Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML
Today, while trying to have a serious conversation with my husband about his drug use over text, he came home. Drunk. FML
Emotional
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He went outside for a "breather" and never came back. FML
Planned parenthood
Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. I also found out that the dad has a fiancée. FML
Today, I decided to surprise my husband by bringing home a case of beer and renting us a porno. He decided to surprise me by telling me he was leaving me for his pregnant girlfriend. FML
Congrats!
Today, I found out my husband is having a baby. Too bad I'm not pregnant. FML
Don't push me 'cause I'm close to the edge, I'm trying not to lose my head
Today, and since I found out that I'm pregnant, I've been sober. I used to smoke weed to help with me depression and anxiety, but now I can't even take prescription medicine for it. I'm about to throw hands at this point. FML
Top comments
Lioness8197 18
You really picked a winner:) Good luck and congrats!
elk21dbm 18
Congratulations on the baby!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (153)
10showgirl 16
I wouldn't be too happy if my husband went to a strip club or smoked weed. That should have died down before y'all got married. He probably won't stop just because a baby is on the way. I hope I'm wrong though... Congrats
EMLM 3
You picked some lovely caring guy there
eash 10
Maybe he doesn't want to be a father?
20Pekoe20 5
he was just excited.
Jebitesevsi 11
This is why we have abortion.
Yuuuuuuuutttt 8
is there any chance you aren't spawning another one of him? a doctor maybe?
Arlisshsr 9
woohoo fatherhood! lets get ****** up!
derpina72 23
Step 1) Lift your foot. Step 2) Shove it up his ass.
alex_gen 39
YDI. You knew his personality and married him anyway.
bgbailey 7
maybe he wanted one last hurrah. get it out his system before you ruin his life with a kid.