Experimenting with your own things is fine. Experimenting by stealing something is just wrong. He should not be taught that it's ok to steal, especially with items such as lingerie, whatever he was doing with it, it's wrong. The only reason it would be acceptable is if it was just a laundry mix up.

But she(I'm assuming, otherwise, this is even more interesting) is just as guilty as he is. I also assuming he didn't just leave it on the floor. She was snooping, which is also not cool. Both side are crossing the line. And if she confronts him, he will feel hurt and violated as his privacy was compromised. Don't get me wrong, he shouldn't have done that, but I don't know of a god way to walk this back. The best play, in my opinion, is just put it back in his room. Whatever he was doing is not something you really want to be a part of, and she will never feel sexy wearing those items again.

No that's her lingerie. She had every right to get it back.

Unless she knew he had it, she was snooping. And there is no good way this ends. Confronting him might reestablish boundaries, or it might embarrass him to a suicidal extent. Put it this way -15 year olds have hung themselves over less.

Stealing other people's underwear is a muuuuch worse offense than snooping. Besides, he had to snoop in order to steal them, so he's done more things wrong than her.

#60 - sure, she is the aggrieved party. But without treading VERY carefully, there is little chance her brother doesn't get crushed by this. Not saying there shouldn't be boundaries, but she literally has him by his panties. I see the safest bet being to let it go and put a lock on the door.

@64 You're assuming this kid is suicidal because he's a teen, and that's not okay. You're also assuming Op was snooping. What if she was putting his laundry away and happened upon her lingerie? You want to cut this kid some slack, but Op doesn't get any? Chances are, this kid is just horny and

@64 @65 didn't know who the lingerie belonged to. Op's safest bet is to take them back and gently start a discussion with her brother about boundries.

If the OP's brother was sent into a suicidal episode by a rational conversation about boundaries, then said sibling has more major underlying issues than having his feelings hurt, just the same as any other 15 year old that makes a suicide attempt over a single embarrassing conversation about privacy or something more minor. And if one such conversation pushed them over, something else would have eventually. Saying that OP should pretend it never happened to save her siblings feelings when they rather apparently feel violated is NOT how the situation should be handled.

@65 I'm not assuming he's suicidal. But all you have to do is google "transgender suicide rate" and you'll see it's off the charts.The stigma attached must be very scary to someone who is already pretty confused. So all I'm advising is extreme caution, because it could go very south very fast.

@48 I wouldn't leave my lingerie in his room. I would take it back because it didn't belong to him, but I also would say nothing about it. He won't know for sure I took them back, and he certainly isn't going to say anything about it to me either. What would he say? "Hey sis, have you seen the lingerie you took out of my room that belonged to you?"