Today, I flew my girlfriend to Paris for our one year anniversary. Little did I know that instead of going up the Eiffel Tower and over looking the most romantic city she would rather spend it in bed with a French man. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my marriage must be over. We just spent a week in Paris, the most romantic city in the world, and we never left our hotel room. Not because of constant sex but because my wife couldn’t be arsed to get dressed, be romantic or anything. She sat on her tablet watching Netflix IN FUCKING PARIS. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. I told her best friend the plan the day before. I got reservations to a restaurant on the beach, and we were going to arrive via boat. She never showed. Her parents called me asking why she left town to go to Paris. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out for dinner to a fancy Italian restaurant for our one year anniversary. After giving her some roses, freshly baked cookies, and a thoughtful poem I wrote for her, she started laughing and asked for her real gift. FML
Today, I flew home early from a two-month trip to Europe to surprise my boyfriend on his birthday. When I got to his house with a home baked cake from scratch and a quilt with silk-screened pictures from my trip, his roommate answered the door and said, "Oh sorry, he's out with his girlfriend." FML
Today, I thought I would be cute for my one year anniversary with my girlfriend, so I cooked a three course meal for her with candles and rose petals on the floor. She loved the dinner, except now she's passed out in a food coma upstairs while I'm left with the dishes. FML
Today, after we got married five months ago, my wife and I planned a trip to France and Spain as a honeymoon. We’re supposed to be leaving on Saturday. She just told me last night, “I am so not looking forward to the trip.” FML
Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be romantic to take me to a strip club for our 1-year anniversary. FML
Today, I taught my girlfriend some French. She then used her newfound language to break up with me. FML
Today, the girl I'm in love with invited me to stay with her in Europe for 2 weeks, she's even paying for the flights and accommodation. It's because I'm such a special friend to her, and she wants me to come up to meet her fiancé before she gets married. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I went on vacation. We flew 2000 miles, got off the plane, got our bags and stood outside the airport for our ride. She looks at me and says, "I can't do this anymore." So, she broke up with me and flew back home. Now I'm on vacation alone. FML
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Top comments
drzhottie148 0
shit i'll leave her ass in Paris. Leave a note in the room.."try finding your way back bitch" Take all the money.
blue_dude 0
ouch, that sounds terrible, you should have flown home and left her there
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Comments (119)
pjunglist 0
One year and you sent her to paris? You're an idiot for not noticing the girls just not that into you.
plexico 4
But she did go up the Eiffel Tower, and down, and up, and down, and up, and down, and up, and down, and up, and down, and up, and down, and up, and down, and up, and down. And then had a cigarette.
Intoxicunt 6
Lol. She definitely went down... Plexico = win.
JulzKay 0
What an International Hussy!
midwestjerk 0
If there is any way to cancel/destroy her return ticket _and_ prevent her from flying home, do so. If you have a joint credit card, cancel that. For further fun, destroy her passport. Strand the bitch in France with no access to money. You fly to the states, move out, sell her stuff, and get the bitch out of your life. It'll be fun.
omghappy 0
ha! that sucks!
begrunge 0
Ouch... that sucks... You sound like a sweet guy.. im sorry this happened to you. i dont reccomend vengeance, but deffinitely leave her. i hope you find true love someday.
oopsie_daisy8446 0
c'est vrai, oui? oui oui? DID HE HAVE A FRENCH MOUSTACHE??????
SunshinePants 0
RE: #67, I have a feeling that you're only around twelve years old. Your ignorance is disgusting. I know many French people, they dress no different than any other person. Also, grammar is not that hard of a concept. Use it.
acranine11 0
You three could have Eiffel towered :)
theycallmenell 0
l'homme de francais = sexy time!!!!