Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm Dad." FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I announced my pregnancy to my boss. I was expecting all sorts of reactions, except, "But... Erm... How did that happen?" FML
Today, over a family dinner, my husband and I told everyone that I'm pregnant. My father frowned and said, "Again?", my 9-year-old daughter started crying, and her brother smirked and yelled, "Up the ass, no babies!" FML
Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML
Today, my husband of 6 years said in a grave voice that he had some important news for me. Jokingly, I said, "Why, did you get that cute colleague of yours pregnant?" He did. FML
Today, my husband of 3 years learned that he's going to be a father. No, I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I received several texts congratulating me on my pregnancy. It turns out that my husband announced he is going to be a father on Facebook, which I don't use. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I broke the news to my parents that we're having a baby. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "It's probably not yours." FML
Today, my husband and I announced at a family get-together that I'm pregnant with our fourth child. My dad sighed, and spent the rest of the evening acting moody, and eventually muttering about how he'd raised a "damned broodmare." FML
Today, after years of trying, I got the wonderful news that my husband is going to be a father. Too bad I’m not the mother. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's office after getting a positive pregnancy test. She did another one to confirm the result, which came back negative. My husband is wandering around with a great big smile on his face, because he isn't going to "have a rugrat." FML
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Top comments
amburrjade 28
It's begun. Welcome to 20+ years of Dad Jokes.
iipinkette 16
He has passed the dad jokes test, he's ready.
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Comments (75)
aylatan_ 9
He saw his chance and he took it!
AmeliaPond21042 20
lmao at least he has his dad jokes down and it could be worse! lol i wouldve laughed and said welp dad jokes can be marked off the list. xD
Dave_Davington 33
There's this thing called a sense of humour. Perhaps you should look into getting one.
dabaerju 23
Perhaps you should look into getting one.
worldclassrager 39
Ugh the worst comment after anything... Congrats OP
delichick 27
Op, whats the problem? That was funny! Least he didnt bolt, deny the pregnancy and acuse you of cheating on him - there a million things he could have done. Like someone else said, you need to look into getting a sense of humour, your husband has one.
hockey_kid23 18
I do believe that is the very first dad joke that can be made by a father. And it was well played on his part it seems.
leogachi 15
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Congrats on the baby. I'm sorry your husband spoiled the moment with such a shitty joke.
kaotic_angel88 24
He didnt spoil the moment. Hes probably really excited. Plus, he needs to get jokes down now so he can embarrass his children in the future.
leogachi 15
@36 What reason would Op have had to post this if she didn't think he spoiled the moment? His excitement doesn't change the fact that she thought the joke was dumb.
9a_1z 12
Because it was a harbinger of what's to come. Her husband has become dad, destroyer of jokes.
sillymink 9
Why did this even get published? I don't even have a little bit of sympathy. Not F my life material.
Tyrez 32
Agreed. Don't see anything wrong with this moment.
mixximoo 24
Congrats OP! Sounds like your husband will be a great dad
Waschlappen 23
I think he sounds hilarious! And at least he's already committed with calling himself dad. I understand that you might have wanted a different reaction, but when you're with a goof ball you must expect them to react with humor to almost everything, even serious subjects. I know, I'm dating one myself.