Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm Dad." FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
How d'you think?
Today, I announced my pregnancy to my boss. I was expecting all sorts of reactions, except, "But... Erm... How did that happen?" FML
Today, over a family dinner, my husband and I told everyone that I'm pregnant. My father frowned and said, "Again?", my 9-year-old daughter started crying, and her brother smirked and yelled, "Up the ass, no babies!" FML
Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML
Today, my husband of 6 years said in a grave voice that he had some important news for me. Jokingly, I said, "Why, did you get that cute colleague of yours pregnant?" He did. FML
Today, my husband of 3 years learned that he's going to be a father. No, I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I received several texts congratulating me on my pregnancy. It turns out that my husband announced he is going to be a father on Facebook, which I don't use. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I broke the news to my parents that we're having a baby. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "It's probably not yours." FML
Think of the environment
Today, my husband and I announced at a family get-together that I'm pregnant with our fourth child. My dad sighed, and spent the rest of the evening acting moody, and eventually muttering about how he'd raised a "damned broodmare." FML
Classic Dave
Today, after years of trying, I got the wonderful news that my husband is going to be a father. Too bad I’m not the mother. FML
Dodged a bullet
Today, I went to the doctor's office after getting a positive pregnancy test. She did another one to confirm the result, which came back negative. My husband is wandering around with a great big smile on his face, because he isn't going to "have a rugrat." FML
Top comments
amburrjade 28
It's begun. Welcome to 20+ years of Dad Jokes.
iipinkette 16
He has passed the dad jokes test, he's ready.
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Comments (75)
Llama_Face89 33
The dad-joke is strong with this one..
anonymousbunnii 8
lol he's a keeper
chuchusheep 19
hes probably been planning that forever.
Rysal5 15
Dad jokes are the best.
emisheah 17
He's ready
pinkiepink 15
this is beautiful. the jokes have started. congratulations.
willydafo 10
It has begun
shepardkinz 19
He is ready to be a father.
S1N9UL4R17Y 8
your life sounds like its going pretty great actually! XD congrats btw.
elizacandle 29
this isn't an fml,he's ready!