Love: Today, I drunk texted a guy I like. We'd met at an Alcoholics...

By Username - 17/08/2011 23:37 - United States

Today, I drunk texted a guy I like. We'd met at an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 680

You deserved it 41 802

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Same thing different taste

Let down

By MoxyR12 - 24/06/2009 15:33 - United States

Today, I was texting this guy that I really liked. Things were going pretty well. I got a call from his number and excitedly answered it. It was his girlfriend asking if he was bothering me because he likes to text random people when he's drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 803

You deserved it 5 707

By sober - 12/02/2009 02:09 - United States

Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 381

You deserved it 4 325

By rachaaaaeul - 06/08/2010 07:07 - United States

Today, I was texting my boyfriend about yesterday, where he told me how much he loved me, and he wishes we lived closer. I asked him if he really meant it. Turns out he was drunk, and had no idea what he was talking about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 065

You deserved it 4 019

The hangover from hell

By jeannie - 20/09/2023 14:00 - Canada - Montréal

Today, slightly drunk from a head-frazzle of a night out from hell, I sent a text meant for my friend recounting the terrible date I'd just been on… to the date himself. He replied with, "I know, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 122

You deserved it 874

By TheOtherWoman - 20/07/2009 07:10 - United States

Today, the guy I've been sleeping with for the last three weeks got really drunk. I drove him home from the party and took care of him. At 2am he asked for the phone. When I asked what for, he said he wanted to drunk dial his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 012

You deserved it 12 785

By thelunarwolf - 02/03/2011 03:41

Today, while trying to have a serious conversation with my husband about his drug use over text, he came home. Drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 854

You deserved it 8 873

Notice me Senpai

By Anonymous - 23/01/2023 11:00

Today, I’m so in love with a guy that I will even take a drunken text from him if it means getting attention from him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 440

You deserved it 575

By MC - 15/08/2011 02:51 - Canada

Today, I was so drunk that I gave my mom's number instead of mine to the really cute guy I met at the bar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 516

You deserved it 39 596

By 3some? uh, no - 01/02/2013 19:59 - Dominican Republic

Today, I finally found the courage to ask a guy I like out for a drink. He accepted, we drank, and when it came time to go home, I half-drunkenly left him my number. Once I got back home, I realized I'd actually given him my dad's number instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 245

You deserved it 33 135

By Aus - 26/04/2012 14:43 - United States

Today, I received a text from the guy I'm into, thanking me for helping him drunkenly stumble back to his apartment last night. He ended it with, "How long did you stay?" Apparently, he doesn't remember confessing his secret love for me, or the fantastic kiss that followed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 005

You deserved it 4 201

juliaaalove 8

Thursday 18 August 2011 8:40

Ya.. I don't think things will work out for the two of you..

KristinaKreme 0

Thursday 18 August 2011 8:41

At least he understands?

Comments

devore504 7

Friday 19 August 2011 5:40

You really shouldnt be with him honey

dubstepp 15

Friday 19 August 2011 8:59

DONT DRINK!!!!

GamerMaster2041 12

Saturday 20 August 2011 23:28

#86 and how do you think someone can live for 3 days without DRINKING anything. Like water for example.

UhLeeUh 6

Friday 19 August 2011 10:58

hah, yeah, fyl.

ssgurl22 0

Friday 19 August 2011 12:15

should we feel sorry for you???? dont drag him down

ohmandapants 16

Saturday 20 August 2011 0:29

Glad to see that's working out for ya...

VileBreed_Hawk 0

Sunday 21 August 2011 5:26

that shit is funny

leothekitty 3

Sunday 21 August 2011 20:51

well that seems appropriate

Appayipyip 4

Tuesday 23 August 2011 23:40

ROFL the irony.

MarioDragon 14

Saturday 8 October 2011 4:31

That kinda thing bothers me more than most things...

Lysergic 0

Sunday 9 October 2011 22:47

Well at least you know the two of you share a common interest

Keywords

Animals Cute Cats Sex Intimacy Awkward Family Work Alcohol Coworkers Mental health Psychology Health AITA Relationship advice Weird Love Cops Miscellaneous Neighbours Scary Stressed out Parents Cake Birthday Dogs Transportation Cars Embarrassing Fire

The Top

Today, my wife told me that when she was actually pregnant with her ex's child; she was insatiably horny and always wanted sex. Too bad for me, because the current pregnancy has made her repulsed by any sexual contact. Thanks for telling me, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 232

You deserved it 220

Today, an interviewer rang me back, but not to offer me the job. It was to warn me that if my psychotic mother rang him at his home address again trying to bribe and threaten him into giving me the job, then he would call the police and press charges for harassment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 505

You deserved it 56

The Top

Today, I started charging my phone in the car during a family road trip. The car recognized my iPhone as an MP3 player and started playing the audio from the porn video I watched before we left. Everybody heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 681

You deserved it 44 213

Today, my wife and I decided to go to an adult store and buy some toys to spice up the bedroom a bit. She wanted to buy a double-edged dildo so "we can use it together". I'm a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 724

You deserved it 747

Today, I'm in Spain, and told the kids with whom I will be working that I was excited to be working with them. Only the form of excitement I used apparently refers to sexual excitement. Basically, I told the kids I was sexually aroused to be working with them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 261

You deserved it 14 346

Today, after many, many years of desperate bodily insecurity and therapy, I woke up next to the man of my dreams, who told me the sex was wonderful. Apparently, gin plays wonders with my memory. I don't remember a thing. And that was my first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 705

You deserved it 897

Today, my water got cut off. The previous homeowners owed the water company over $300, and the company doesn't believe that I'm not them. The supervisor told me this will keep happening until I pay up. I need a shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 377

You deserved it 2 905

Today, I was giving a lecture to my class I heard a phone go off. Aggravated and exhausted, I asked everyone to turn their phones off. Then the phone rang again. I lost my shit and spent the next half hour calling my students a bunch of "technology whores". Then I realized the phone was mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 203

You deserved it 200 016

Same thing different taste

Let down

The hangover from hell

Notice me Senpai

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