Today, I cut my nice and tasty home-made sandwich in half to give to a homeless man. He tasted it, pulled an unimpressed face, and then stuck it in his pocket. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I was outside, eating a sandwich, when I noticed a homeless man was standing in front of me. Upon making eye contact, he grabbed the rest of my sandwich and ran off. FML
Today, I was sitting in the park eating a sandwich, when a homeless guy asked me for some spare change. I said I didn't have any. He offered an "erotic striptease" in exchange for my sandwich. I said no. He gave one anyway. I walked back to work on an empty stomach. FML
Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML
Today, I realized that I'm a terrible human being. For the first time in my life, I gave some change to a homeless guy, but only so he'd get out of my face long enough for me to watch two other bums beating the crap out of each other over a sandwich. FML
Today, I saw a homeless man asking for money for food. Not wanting to give him money so he'd spend it on booze, I decided to buy him a full big mac meal from McDonalds. When I went to hand it to him, he quickly waved his hand, denying it saying, "Thanks but I'm a vegetarian". FML
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man. I gave him my sandwich, since he needed it more than me. Seconds later, he was attacked by a flock of birds. FML
Today, I decided to buy a meal for a homeless man who was being shunned at an intersection. When I went to hand it to him, I realized it was my dad, wearing a tattered old shirt and pretending to be homeless to make some money. FML
Today, I made a sandwich. When I went to grab chips, my wife snatched it. I made a second sandwich. My son came in and stole the plate when I was grabbing a seltzer. I went to make a third sandwich. No more cold cuts. FML
Today, I realized the person I had been habitually stealing bag lunches from at work made me a canned dog food sandwich. FML
Today, as I was out walking, one homeless man sitting with two others asked me for something to eat. Trying to do a good deed, I bought the three men a bag of apples. They then fought viciously over them before the first man chased me for handing them to "the wrong one." FML
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Top comments
alex_vik 1
Maybe he was saving it to ration?
sabrage 0
Was there mustard on it? Mustard is disgusting.
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Comments (42)
dUCKEYgIRL 0
seriously? your life if ****** cuz a homeless man didn't like your sandwich? maybe you should try being thankful you aren't homeless.
allupinyourmama 0
agreed.
thatonegirl14 0
ewwh how can you put food in a pockettt ewwwh .
Blippety 23
If you're living on the streets, getting a bit of lint on the sides of your sandwich is the least of your problems.
DomoCullen 0
hmm, better put this in my pocket...
Poepiepiesie 3
Give him a better one next day. I mean he can't buy a decebt meal himself wouldn't you help with such an incomprehensible task.
allupinyourmama 0
he's probably used to eating turd sandwiches
rileysmileydog 0
He wanted beer money!
Mi24hind 0
It's the thought that counts, right?
kickboxingchick 5
Obviously it's not "tasty"..
JulesVern16 5
Apparently it wasn't that "nice and tasty."
Midnightpearls 13
How do you fit a sandwich in your pocket? O.o