Today, I cut my finger open with a spoon. After waiting for 4 hours in the emergency room, the doctor told me I was missing too much flesh to qualify for stitches. He then called 2 other doctors in to examine it. Apparently they had a contest for patient with most ridiculous injury. I won. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while observing a surgery, I was asked to open a glass ampule of adrenaline. Not only did I break it and get it everywhere, I sliced open my thumb bad enough to need stitches. FML
Today, I sliced my finger open because my roommate's girlfriend put a broken ceramic plate in the recycling. I was putting some paper in the bin and all of a sudden, an inch and a half of my flesh is naked to the world. I don't have medical insurance, so I fixed it with Superglue. FML
Today, I visited the hospital with my boyfriend to have an injury checked. When the doctor removed the band-aid, my boyfriend started screaming and passed out. I had to get him out of the room using a wheelchair. The "injury" is a cut on his finger. FML
Today, I was washing the dishes when I gave myself a nasty gash on my leg from the open dishwasher door. After five minutes of cleaning up the blood and wrapping it up, I came back to finish the job only to drop a plate and send broken shards into my foot. FML
Today, I was cutting some paper when I accidentally cut a sizeable chunk out of my finger. I went to my car to get my bumbag (I'm a lifeguard) so I could patch it up. I then promptly got a large piece of glass in my foot. FML
Today, I cut my finger with a knife while cooking. I work in a hospital and have to use hand disinfectant at least every twenty minutes. It hurts badly. I have to work for eight hours. FML
Today, I cut my hand on nothing while at work. It bled so much, I began to feel woozy, and everyone kept brushing me off when I asked where the first aid kits were. FML
Today, I was at the doctor's getting some skin scraped off the bottom of my foot for some tests. As soon as the doctor grabbed my foot, it tickled and I accidentally kicked him in the face. During this, the blade sliced my foot open. FML
Today, I was rushing with the dishes when I scraped against a very sharp knife, which left a noticeable cut right down my wrist. No one believes my story that it was a freak kitchen accident, they think that I’m either an attention seeking fucknut, or crying out for help. FML
Today, while making dinner I cut my finger badly with a knife. When I yelled for my dad to drive me to the hospital, he accused me of lying to get attention. He had to taste my blood before he decided it wasn't red-colored corn syrup. FML
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Top comments
Tequilamockngbrd 7
Wow... that takes skill, my friend. That, or you've got some dangerous ******* spoons in your kitchen. At least you discovered that before it got to your mouth, right?
laughing_zebra 0
Seriously... A spoon?
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Comments (227)
reecescuphoe 0
lmao..end of story
jonny2x4 0
(FACEPALM)
Wet_Dream 0
haha house md stuff!!
Dutchie2010 0
WHAT KIND OF SPOONS DO YOU OWN ?!
rosierosierosie 0
did you win anything?
smartass101 0
hahahah, this happened to me when I was hospitalized for a turtle bite, granted it was a 135lbs Macroclemys temmincki (alli snapper) bite. the triage nurses took pictures with their phones.
jadetothes 0
hey! spoons actually hurt more than forks when you stab your hand! spoon injuries are more common than you have been led to believe...
fdeg4161 13
Okay, it's never fun for anyone when they might, or might not in this case, have to get stitches, but to be cut by a spoon is just downright hilarious. XP
israelnotjacob 20
This one is probably fake, but if you're seriously dumb enough to cut yourself with a spoon you deserve it.
Bloodknight 22
This makes absolutely no sense whatsoever...