Today, I cut down a dead tree in my yard. The top hit the ground and the base seesawed up in the air and came down on my head. I hit the ground like a sack of flour. Fortunately, the wood was rotted and soft. Unfortunately, the chainsaw was still running. 28 stitches in my calf. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally went to Home Depot to buy a chainsaw to cut down the tree leaning dangerously over my garage. When I got home, I found the tree had fallen and taken out the roof while I was shopping. FML
Today, I was awakened by the sound of chain-saws. Moments later a tree branch came through my roof. FML
Today, I was helping my boyfriend in the garden. When I wanted to break a piece of wood, I lost my balance. Head first against a stone. Result: five stitches in my upper lip, and a loose tooth. FML
Today, my husband finally got round to cutting down a tree limb in our front yard after months of me begging him. It fell on me. FML
Today, in a scene worthy of any comedy movie, I slipped and landed on my ass right on the garden rake my husband left in the grass. Sounds funny, right? Well, I have 9 holes in my ass and thigh that need stitches. One of them came close to poking my femoral artery, so technically I almost died. FML
Today, I was trying to convince my husband to not trim the lower branches of my favorite tree. After pleading my case, I turned around and ran smack into one of said branches. My face and my dignity still hurt. FML
Today, I got into a fight with a lawnmower after walking backwards to pull around/avoid running over a root, and I tripped over a sitting log by our campfire and broke three of my toes (thankfully, a log half blocked the blades) so now I'm on crutches and need to wear a boot for 6-8 weeks, and I'm banned from mowing for the year. FML
Today, I was skiing and crashed into a tree. It was the only tree on the slope. FML
Today, I was horseback riding. Somebody yelled something behind me, so I turned around. Next thing I know, I am on the ground and my head is killing me. It turns out I ran into a tree branch. The person behind me simply said, "Watch out!" FML
Today, I accidentally slammed my leg against the coffee table. It was only after I went to the bathroom a few minutes later that I realized there's now a massive gash on my upper leg. I also got in trouble for yelling, "SON OF A BITCH!" as soon as the impact occurred. FML
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Top comments
SlightlySadistic 0
-cringes- Oh my god, OUCH.
choppedNskrewed 0
holy crap, so you basically cut your leg with a chainsaw? shitttt *vomits*
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Comments (248)
Holymonkeypee 0
Why would your cow need stitches?
mufi1996 0
this is an actual fml. not the other ones written by ppl who just bitch.
desser627 0
bet that was bloody.. fyl.
Countryboy2188 0
Learn to fall a tree ya dumb ass. Some ppl shouldn't be allowed to use power tools
Bforr 5
Holy Shit. That sounds like it hurts
chanicol 2
my dad is a professional, grew up around chain saws and that sucks but u are incredibly lucky stitches is the worst. we have put people in the ground, and I have met a few that have lost limbs. was told as a kid, this is why we don't play with them. get well soon.
RufusthePenis 0
Atleast it didn't go right through your leg..
fuzzybear14 0
oh my god Im so sorry!
Ugi 27
Although that must really suck, I think you were lucky - you could easily have a broken neck or brain damage from the head-strike or could have lost something important to the saw. I suspect you may not have been trained to use the chainsaw 'cos watching professionals at work, they get back real fast after the tree starts to fall and the moment the saw is not in use it's killed. I guess this is the reason why. Cut-resistant trousers are apparently also compulsory if you use a CS in your job - at least in the UK.
cl4ptp 18
Holy shit! FYL!