dogggg
Pune, India
Today, I caught my dog drinking from the toilet. After yelling at him, his apology was licking my face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
killjoyx
Suffolk, United States
Today, when I woke up, my dog excitedly came up to me and licked my face. A few minutes later, I find out he had thrown up twice before he licked my face. FML
Anonymous
Nutritious
Today, I caught my dog “cleaning” the cat’s litter box. He won’t be giving me any kisses anytime soon. FML
aaalias34
United States
Today, my dog farted. Immediately, he turned around to sniff his stink then furiously licked his butthole. He then licked my nose. FML
Andrea Trevor
Today, I woke up at 5 a.m. to my dog jumping off of my bed. No big deal. I rolled over to the other side of the bed to fall back asleep and my face landed right in a puddle of his pee. I tasted it. FML
Username
United States
Today, I decided to play with my dog. I sat on the ground and whistled for him to come to me. I smiled when I saw him running at my happily. He sniffed me, turned around, lifted his leg and peed on me. FML
SHIT-BREATH
Chepstow, United Kingdom
Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML
Vicky
My BFF
Today, I took my dog to the vet. He sat on my lap the whole car ride, licking my face and acting like my best friend. As soon as we got inside, he turned into a Tasmanian devil and pissed on my shoes, all while looking at me like I'd betrayed him. FML
Steve
Self-defeating move
Today, my dog discovered his new toilet by taking a dump on his own bowl. FML
smellsofeggs
United Kingdom
Today, I was having a playful fight with my brother. I made the point that our dog likes me better than him. To this, my dog jumped onto the sofa, turned to me and vomited on my face. FML
dani0810
Sudbury, Canada
Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML
Top comments
Crazynocatlady 22
He was probably just trying to get rid of the taste of his balls.
martialart1st18 19
Ew you need to wash your face.
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Comments (77)
worldclassrager 41
Actually toilet water is very clean...but for future reference have his water dish full
cjwayy 22
Close your toilet lid.
Muttley9 13
Typical dog behavior. Be very glad that the dog had had not just consuming 'treats' from the cat litter box as well <yes, I have this demonstration of 'love' as well> :)
buckdharma 38
I feel for you op, because my pet does this too, and I hate the smell of anchovies.
ArgentumAurum 24
Like yelling is going to get much across to a dog...
lkb307 21
sounds like a doggone predicament
littlehuman 9
maybe he wasn't apologising
Kekslama 5
I am missing the "the toilet hadnt been fl ushed" - sentence.
Emilygod2 14
Omg i saw this one on whisper too
bryanjamieluke 17
Do you let your dog lick your face at other times? For all you know, he's just licked his balls before giving you a smooch. Since toliet bowls should be relatively clean, there are worse things his tongue could have come in contact with.