dogggg
Pune, India
Today, I caught my dog drinking from the toilet. After yelling at him, his apology was licking my face. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
killjoyx
Suffolk, United States
Today, when I woke up, my dog excitedly came up to me and licked my face. A few minutes later, I find out he had thrown up twice before he licked my face. FML
Anonymous
Nutritious
Today, I caught my dog “cleaning” the cat’s litter box. He won’t be giving me any kisses anytime soon. FML
aaalias34
United States
Today, my dog farted. Immediately, he turned around to sniff his stink then furiously licked his butthole. He then licked my nose. FML
Andrea Trevor
Today, I woke up at 5 a.m. to my dog jumping off of my bed. No big deal. I rolled over to the other side of the bed to fall back asleep and my face landed right in a puddle of his pee. I tasted it. FML
Username
United States
Today, I decided to play with my dog. I sat on the ground and whistled for him to come to me. I smiled when I saw him running at my happily. He sniffed me, turned around, lifted his leg and peed on me. FML
SHIT-BREATH
Chepstow, United Kingdom
Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML
Vicky
My BFF
Today, I took my dog to the vet. He sat on my lap the whole car ride, licking my face and acting like my best friend. As soon as we got inside, he turned into a Tasmanian devil and pissed on my shoes, all while looking at me like I'd betrayed him. FML
Steve
Self-defeating move
Today, my dog discovered his new toilet by taking a dump on his own bowl. FML
smellsofeggs
United Kingdom
Today, I was having a playful fight with my brother. I made the point that our dog likes me better than him. To this, my dog jumped onto the sofa, turned to me and vomited on my face. FML
dani0810
Sudbury, Canada
Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML
Top comments
Crazynocatlady 22
He was probably just trying to get rid of the taste of his balls.
martialart1st18 19
Ew you need to wash your face.
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Comments (77)
amunnra 14
That's what you get for shouting at pets instead of properly training them. Plus, unless the dog can open doors, it's not his fault the toilet was accessible. YDI for having a pet you apparently know nothing about.
ghostsoul21 12
What do you expect? He's a dog and he loves you? Even if you yell, he's going to lick you.. Even if he just drank from a toilet
swagstatic 16
You can't tell your dog no for drinking out of the toilet that's like you going to a public water fountain machine ( the one your suppose to drink out of) and trying to drink out of it an everyone says NO!!!! Bad person. You wouldn't understand what you did wrong right?
Morning_fml 22
It's okay, it's the thought that counts.
abc_1_2_3 12
Aww how disgustingly cute ^_^
LukyBugger 7
At least he loves you
middlenamefrank 8
Okay...he's a dog, you're a human. If you don't like him drinking out of the toilet (though I can't for the life of me figure out why people don't like that), keep the lid closed. And if you don't want him licking your face, keep your face away from his. Sounds like the dog's being a dog. It's the human that's failing in this scenario.
NML27 8
I agree, I don't understand why people think it's so gross. They lick themselves, they get right up in there to sniff each other's butts, they roll in dead animals, and they eat their own (and others) poop. What's wrong with a little toilet water? I had a dog that wouldn't drink water from her water bowl, no matter how fresh it was. She wanted the toilet water and would whine at the door until someone let her in the bathroom. After awhile we ended up not even using a water dish we just made sure to flush the toilet and leave the seat up.
ohSNAPyall 27
What a brown-noser.
TwentyFourBeerz 18
Awwe, that's too cute
jonnypoopsies 3
At least he said sorry