Kids: Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink...

By Anonymous - 21/03/2009 04:46 - United States

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. Then I found another note on a can that said, "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 607

You deserved it 689 008

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Nick - 13/08/2009 19:47 - United States

Today, I was looking in the refrigerator for something to drink. I found a jug of lemonade with a piece of paper on it saying "Mom's Lemonade, Don't Drink!" I was really thirsty, so I ignored it and drank the whole jug. My mom is about to have a colonoscopy and had filled it with laxatives. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 410

You deserved it 147 207

By Anonymous - 07/06/2019 22:00

Today, I went into my fridge and someone had drank all the beer. Only my 8-year-old son lives with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 639

You deserved it 389

Irony failure

By alcoholic - 31/10/2009 14:30 - Estonia

Today, I was telling my teenage daughter about the effects from alcohol, and how she should not give in to peer pressure. While talking, I noticed that she was looking at me funny. There was a wine glass in my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 827

You deserved it 51 750

Can't stop, won't stop

By Matt8 - 07/12/2012 01:07 - United States

Today, I found out that my wife, who is supposed to be a recovering alcoholic, drank an entire bottle of wine and then tried to hide it at the bottom of a garbage bin. To make matters worse, when I confronted her about it, she tried to convince me that our 5-year-old daughter had drunk it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 472

You deserved it 2 121

About to Popov

By badmom - 27/03/2009 18:42 - United States

Today, I was packing my son's lunch and we'd ran out of water bottles. I asked my 16 year-old to run to the store. She didn't want to, but gave me one she had. After dropping my son off, my daughter frantically told me she'd made a mistake. I sent my second grader to school with a bottle of vodka. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90 368

You deserved it 17 988

By jgdgjyfg - 25/07/2011 07:21 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad taped a picture of me to the fridge with "Do not feed the she-beast" written on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 200

You deserved it 8 913

By reasonablysingle - 11/06/2016 03:27 - Australia - Greystanes

Today, I'm taking care of my 12-year-old daughter because my ex-wife thought she could cure our daughter's lactose intolerance by sneaking milk into her soy breakfast. The milk had expired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 399

You deserved it 1 267

Hormonal hell

By Anonymous - 05/08/2020 23:02

Today, someone drank a sip of my single serve pasteurized orange juice and put it back in the fridge, ignoring the whole jug of non-pasteurized juice, that I cant drink because im pregnant. I cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 517

You deserved it 278

By ccat209 - 20/12/2016 04:05 - United States - Riverton

Today, my parents finally realized that I've been sneaking vodka when they weren't home. Note to self: don't let them freeze vodka that's actually 75% water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 682

You deserved it 9 077

Family values

By Anonymous - 06/10/2019 12:00 - Croatia

Today, my 11-year-old cousin walked up to me as I was enjoying a glass of wine with friends at my mother's birthday party. Thinking she wouldn't like it anyway, I let her try. The little fucker drank the entire glass in one go, adding, "Usually, daddy gives me vodka." Good to know what my family is up to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 738

You deserved it 648

WowLifeDoesSuck 0

Saturday 21 March 2009 16:01

Wow, kids are getting smarter.

mastercrammer 0

Saturday 21 March 2009 16:05

You should feel lucky to have a smart daughter who really cares about you.

Comments

hug_the_wall 0

Monday 2 August 2010 4:27

some people should not reproduce.

randomviolet 0

Monday 2 August 2010 6:56

haaaaaaa u got pawned by a 7 year old man nnn "swips sweat off head" u have a smart kid

ShotsShotsShotsS 0

Tuesday 3 August 2010 13:26

fail that's from the Internet u retards it was on on YouTube like 3 yes ago

ken328 0

Sunday 8 August 2010 2:40

cool kid :D

rottentomatoes 7

Monday 9 August 2010 17:40

owned :D

Niick_fml 0

Friday 13 August 2010 18:55

YDI for being an alcholic.

theonlysweetpea 10

Sunday 15 August 2010 3:40

lmao Damn!

manw 3

Monday 16 August 2010 14:29

u r such an idiot. it's pretty sad to have a kid telling you not to drink. I mean, seriously? is your condition so bad that your household is being run by someone who would think that the jobros are actually from the future? dude get some help cuz ur daughter might end up like you: drunk, stupid, irresponsible and a weiner. ****.

lillibeth 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 18:38

agreed with 471 what kind of parent are you? she is really concerned about you, and trying to help you but all you say is "**** her, I'm selfish so I'm going to do what I want no matter how my daughter feels" **** YOU!