Miscellaneous: Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought... - FML

26/06/2009 06:13 - United States

Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 564

You deserved it 43 632

Late term

Age difference

You tried

15/09/2014 17:52 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, my daughter came home in tears, completely distraught. It took half an hour to convince her to tell me what was wrong. What horrific thing happened to her? One of her friends wore the same outfit as her to the movies, and apparently that's a betrayal of their friendship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 764

You deserved it 4 049

Mr Loverman

By Anonymous - 14/08/2020 08:01

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend asked when I was going to bed, because he wanted to have sex. With himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 549

You deserved it 266

27/03/2009 00:24 - United States

Today, I was entered into an online contest where they announce your name on the radio and if you call in within an hour they pay your bills for you. I'm unemployed, so I got really excited when they announced my name. My call wouldn't go through - I hadn't paid my phone bill and the line was disconnected. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 177

You deserved it 28 634

In the dark

By Anonymous - 20/01/2021 20:02 - Canada - Kitchener

Spicy

Today, since I've been falling for the girl I've been sleeping with for the past couple of months, I decided it was time for us to talk about making things official and exclusive. I was confident she'd feel the same way. Then I found out she's an escort. FML

I agree, your life sucks 584

You deserved it 965

01/11/2014 00:39

Today, I was walking back to my dorm with my boyfriend. He was being really sweet as he held my hand. We were about to kiss goodnight and as he pushed some hair out of my face he said, "Can we hurry it up? I'm about to rip one." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 974

You deserved it 3 705

31/07/2009 03:44 - United States

Today, I covered for my friend at work because he said he was having car troubles and was going to be late. Two hours into the shift, I got a call from my roommate asking why my girlfriend had moved out. Turns out, I'd covered my friend's shift so he could help my girlfriend move out behind my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 039

You deserved it 3 261

20/02/2009 05:30 - South Africa

Today, at a strategy session my manager displayed a flow chart of his employees. I wasn't included. Apparently I had been fired and they forgot to tell me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 676

You deserved it 2 428

25/02/2009 15:31 - United States

Today, I farted in my cubicle thinking no one would smell it. Two seconds later, everyone came to my cubicle to wish me a happy birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 862

You deserved it 41 570

21/12/2017 06:00

Today, I moved back to a small town after 4 years in the city. I was looking forward to getting away from the light pollution until I woke up in the middle of the night, peered into the pitch black void above my head, and had a panic attack. I need a night light at 23. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 873

You deserved it 866

You went too far

By Dia - 02/05/2021 05:01

Today, I tried to prank my brother with the butter floor prank after coming back from work. As a result, my brother stepped out of ER with an arm cast, stitches on his head and a neck collar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 140

You deserved it 1 967

23/08/2019 20:00

Today, I signed into the Netflix account that I pay for, only to see that my ex had added a new profile for his new girlfriend. We’ve only been separated for two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 871

You deserved it 286

Sad and lonely

By yikes78 - 31/05/2009 13:04 - United States

Today, I went to Macy's to buy some bras. After I paid, the old lady cashier noticed there was pen on one of the bras. By accident, I blurted out, "It's alright. No one's seeing them." The old lady nodded back in agreement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 720

You deserved it 10 478

Oh nose!

By Thatsjustmee - 07/07/2021 04:01 - Canada

Today, I was at rehearsal for a musical. I got a violent nosebleed in the middle of rehearsing and got blood all over my costume. I now owe $350 to the company for the damage I caused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 875

You deserved it 79

13/02/2010 05:23 - France

Today, I realized for the last year that my husband has been home from Iraq, I haven't gotten more than a few hours of sleep at night. Not because he gets nightmares, but because he now snores so loud that the pets sleep at the other end of the house to get rest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 649

You deserved it 3 221

05/03/2012 10:28 - Canada

Today, I was woken up by my neighbour's dog losing its mind, and I remembered reading a story about someone ignoring a dog and later finding out that their car had been stolen. Paranoid, I went outside to check on mine. Nope. Just the damn dog barking at one thirty in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 432

You deserved it 4 045

19/05/2017 20:00

Today, I had a job interview. I was almost late due to road closure and being blocked in my street by the trash truck. The "interview" turned out to be a hiring fair, with lots of other people. I had to wait outside for 3 hours in the sun with no shade, water or food. I didn't get the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 372

You deserved it 340

13/04/2014 03:01 - United States - Boise

Today, I had to work at the restaurant instead of going to the prom, which nobody asked me out to. For five hours, I got to shamefully greet and seat people on their way home from the prom, all of whom knew I was too lame to get asked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 429

You deserved it 4 762

16/09/2013 21:03 - United States - Buffalo

Today, at a family party, my uncles were complimenting my mom on her pies. I cooked them. She took all the credit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 534

You deserved it 3 492

06/10/2015 03:46 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I finally got a job so I could stop missing out on going out with my friends every weekend. Turns out I work only Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays, and there's no way around it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 369

You deserved it 4 808

20/05/2013 16:02 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I was going on a blind date with a girl. She walked up to the table, said "Nah, no thanks" and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 211

You deserved it 4 656

09/08/2013 22:17

Today, I was in the restroom at work, snickering at some funny stories on my phone while I took a dump. Little did I know that the asshole in the next stall would report me to our boss, claiming he'd heard weird noises, then looked over the divider and witnessed me jacking off to porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 881

You deserved it 7 426

09/02/2015 22:58

Today, while correcting essays, I spilled ketchup on a student's paper. I managed to successfully turn it into a happy smiley face but when proudly looking at the result, noticed it was right next to the big "F" that I had graded it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 805

You deserved it 11 004

02/06/2015 08:59 - United States - Laveen

Today, a customer yelled at me because the cherry pie he bought had cherries in it, and he wanted a refund. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 616

You deserved it 1 879

Helping hand

By Anonymous - 30/06/2020 02:02

Spicy

Today, its been so long since I've been single, I’ve reached the age where I need Viagra just to masturbate since there’s no woman in my life to save the pills for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 421

You deserved it 262

12/12/2009 03:12 - United States

Today, I went to my little cousin's school to pick her up and it happened to be my old elementary school. I saw my old teacher and went up to say hi, and after a few minutes she goes "Aren't you the girl who's dad always came in drunk on parent's day?" Nice to know that's how I'm remembered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 316

You deserved it 2 744

Wait, what?

By HereToLaughAtU - 18/11/2014 04:16 - United States - Des Moines

Today, a customer said the pants she was buying rang up more than advertised. I quietly told her plus-sizes were not on sale. The customer yelled in front of a whole line of people, "So I'm fat and can't read! Any other insults you'd like to throw at me?" and stormed out of the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 393

You deserved it 4 790

27/11/2012 14:32 - United States - Baltimore

Today, my husband ran a nice warm bubble bath with extra bubbles. I undressed and slid down into the tub only to have the most ungodly pain go up my backside. Turns out he knocked his razor into the water when he added the bubbles. I now have two butt cracks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 340

You deserved it 1 982

18/07/2009 05:45 - United States

Today, at work, a customer called in and asked me to read off every item on our menu, along with their ingredients. I work at Jamba Juice so that's a lot of reading. After about 10 minutes of this, I found out it was actually my stupid co-worker calling from the back phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 103

You deserved it 9 927

29/12/2011 22:06 - United States

Today, I found out my girlfriend starts fights with me over text because apparently, when I'm arguing with someone, I stop speaking in "annoying shorthand" and am grammatically correct. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 149

You deserved it 38 636

Says something about you, probably

By Amanda Howard - 27/04/2020 02:00

Today, my brother, who recently got out of prison after doing time for armed robbery, got a job at Target. I applied to the same Target six times, and was denied every time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 876

You deserved it 155

12/07/2012 20:35 - Czech Republic - Prague

Today, I nailed every single move in my routine at a gymnastics competition. I then finished off with a perfect split, letting out a fart loud enough to wake up a kid in China. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 475

You deserved it 3 354

10/03/2010 12:12 - United States

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because apparently I don't appreciate how he's different from other guys. I only told him that showering once a month was not normal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 306

You deserved it 4 578

03/09/2015 16:30 - United States

Today, my mom called me a druggie after she found out I smoked weed once. She's now threatening to sell my car, tell my boss, and ban me from seeing my fiancée. I'm 24. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 178

You deserved it 3 903

30/08/2013 21:05 - United States - Utica

Today, my wife appropriated our savings to finance her crazy, midlife crisis idea of designing and marketing Cheez Whiz dildos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 592

You deserved it 3 443

15/02/2017 13:00 - United States - Oxnard

Today, I went on what I thought was my fifth date with a guy. We finally got intimate and it was amazing. As soon as it was over, he said : "Sorry babe, I should get going. I have a date tomorrow and I'd hate to be tired for it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 823

You deserved it 1 217

11/11/2014 18:56 - United States - Dekalb

Today, I walked into my bathroom, only to find my dad passed out on the floor with his pants around his ankles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 014

You deserved it 3 047

16/06/2011 16:14 - China

Today, our new cat, which my mum was hesitant about letting us keep because she believes they're diseased, gave us all ringworm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 138

You deserved it 13 491

11/09/2015 16:34

Today, I asked my teacher if he could tutor me for my upcoming exam. He said he'd look into it and let me know later. I later got called to the principal's office because my teacher claimed I'd propositioned him for sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 963

You deserved it 1 552

Yummy

By Massasam - 11/10/2011 20:53 - United States

Today, I was late for work. Trying to cut a few seconds off the clock, I tried to open my breakfast candy bar while taking a piss. I ended up pissing all over myself and dropping the bar in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 742

You deserved it 41 884

10/02/2010 17:24 - Lebanon

Today, while cleaning around the house, I found a black bra that wasn’t mine. I confronted my husband about it, which turned into a massive fight. It turned out that the bra actually belonged to my son’s girlfriend I didn’t know he had. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 522

You deserved it 30 322

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:06

I'm so jealous, and i'm 19

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:10

Bubble wrap is the greatest thing ever invented. Sometimes, I order things just so I can have the wrapping!

Comments

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:06

I'm so jealous, and i'm 19

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:14

mate.. that is not an fml.. YOU GOT FUCKIN BUBBLEWRAP MANN!! thats like.. fried bacon wrapped icing donut sandwich with peanut butter and nutella filling for really really really big people :P

silvermoonstar3 3

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Friday 26 June 2009 18:05

WTH. How is this FML? I think you posted it on the wrong site. It's not FML, it's MLIA. www.MyLifeIsAverage.com

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Friday 26 June 2009 18:17

I'm Jealous too...bubble wrap is freaking awesome! and im 18. I even got a link where I can play with bubble wrap on my computer

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Friday 26 June 2009 18:25

ditto! I'm 19 and I LOVE bubble wrap :D Honestly this should be what you posted: "Today, my mom put some bubble wrap on my desk because she thought I'd have fun with it. I'm 18 and for some reason I THINK this is an FML. FML" Seriously have you ever had any real struggles in life? lol

Chickenpuddin 0

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Friday 26 June 2009 18:32

You kidding? He got bubble wrap! This is totally a MLIG!

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Friday 26 June 2009 19:00

I love bubble wrap. I'd spend time enjoying myself with bubble wrap...I'm 18 also

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Friday 26 June 2009 19:00

You mean a "My Life is Awesome?"

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Friday 26 June 2009 19:25

I'm only 15. But I still love bubble-wrap. >w

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Friday 26 June 2009 19:39

AGREED!

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Friday 26 June 2009 20:01

Bubble Rap kicks ass! Vote for bubble rap in 2012!

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Friday 26 June 2009 20:02

Is that an actual site lmao.

xxsc 0

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Friday 26 June 2009 20:54

Bloody amazing, man. I want bubble wrap.

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Friday 26 June 2009 21:47

Lmao, I thought that was a joke, and then I went to the site. :P

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Friday 26 June 2009 21:51

Try ordering something from Midway USA (Gunstore, not the island) They use awesome gigantic bubbles.

bubs_AKA_vermin 0

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Friday 26 June 2009 23:07

#13 (or Chaztah, whatever you want) YOU HAVE WON THE GAME. cookie for you.

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Saturday 27 June 2009 0:56

Definitely not an fml... i got a huge package my freshman year in college (my tv) which had tons of the big bubbles. We spread it out down the hallway and took our shoes off and danced and jumped around on it. 4 years in New Orleans, and the bubble wrap was one of my favorite memories. Enjoy it!!

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Saturday 27 June 2009 4:39

I know right! Bubblewrap is freakin' spectacularrrr!!!

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Saturday 27 June 2009 5:05

I would go as far as saying that this belongs on my life is great. http://www.mylifeisg.com :D do it

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Saturday 27 June 2009 6:11

agreed

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Saturday 27 June 2009 7:54

Dude, I'm a grown woman. Married. I'm a mother. As a mother, I must say that your mom is quite the generous woman. If I had bubble wrap, I'd keep it for myself 'cause that stuff is flippin' awesome! X3

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Sunday 28 June 2009 1:25

lol agreed

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Sunday 28 June 2009 21:28

hahaha, i'm 130 lbs and that still sounds delicious

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Monday 29 June 2009 7:47

LMAO, not an FML! I'm 24, have two kids, and I LOVE BUBBLE WRAP!!! Share the wealth!!

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Tuesday 30 June 2009 13:50

Bubble wrap is made of win. You fail. And "texts from last night" gave me this idea. Sex on bubble wrap.

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Tuesday 30 June 2009 17:57

I'm 23 and I'm jealous!

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Thursday 2 July 2009 18:57

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

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Wednesday 8 July 2009 5:58

I'd go one step further that MLIA... This is a Love My Life. http://www.lmylife.com

zeos 0

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Wednesday 8 July 2009 18:35

#137 Same here. 'It was awesome' xDD sounds fun alright ^^

SaportaTheCause 0

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Saturday 11 July 2009 9:19

YOU SHOULD'VE NEVER POSTED THAT WEBSITE. IT MADE ME BURST OUT LAUGHING WHEN MY MOM WAS WATCHING TERMS OF ENDEARMENT. AND ALSO TYPE IN ALL CAPS.

Secret_Fire_King 0

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Tuesday 26 January 2010 3:16

Bubble-wrap is the shiz..

bc465 0

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Wednesday 31 March 2010 1:42

definetely not a fml

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Tuesday 6 July 2010 7:48

heck yes!

aaib 0

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Monday 19 July 2010 4:56

go bubblewrap!

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Friday 27 August 2010 9:30

WIN!!!

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Sunday 29 August 2010 3:14

I think he either means my life is good or my life is great

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Friday 3 September 2010 17:05

no such thing... mlia is my life is average

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Tuesday 1 March 2011 3:29

I'm 26 it's my hobby I have it all over my house YOU'RE NOT ALONE

Coffee_Kaioken 0

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:06

Dude I totally have fun with that. No shame in it. .... What, you thought I'd be the type of loser who says "FIRST COMMENT HAHAHA?" Yeah, try again. -edit- Well, screw that then.

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:33

LOL that made me laugh!!! and i LOVE bubble wrap!! gosh youre lucky!

quiturbitchin 0

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Saturday 27 June 2009 6:21

I agree, bubble wrap kicks ass. QYB.

lovelykendra5 0

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:09

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:29

I'm afraid I must disagree on this one. Bubblewrap is mankind's pinnacle of achievement.

kingoftheworld 0

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Friday 26 June 2009 17:29

That made me LOL. D:

The_Great_Zucchi 14

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Friday 26 June 2009 20:47

That's the great thing about bubblewrap: it's portable so you can have fun inside AND outside!

anniesaysbueno 0

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:09

hey now. bubble wrap us fun at any age. you're life seems awesome to me.

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Friday 26 June 2009 18:37

Dido. I love bubble wrap!

ClaireBear9087 0

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Thursday 14 October 2010 4:35

this should be on MLIA not FML

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:10

i definitly can't put your life is fucked or you deserved it because thast is totally awsome! best fml story EVA

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:10

Bubble wrap is the greatest thing ever invented. Sometimes, I order things just so I can have the wrapping!

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:11

This is NOT an FML. Bubble wrap is incredible. What a thoughtful mother.

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Friday 26 June 2009 19:26

RIGHT!! my mom would've just thrown it away

ctrl 0

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:11

This should be an MLIA. Everyone loves bubble wrap!

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:20

Yeah. bubble wrap's great.

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:12

YES!!!!! Bubble wrap, FTW!

NecessaryForce 0

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Friday 26 June 2009 17:09

I agree, it belongs more on MyLifeIsAverage than on FMyLife.

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Friday 26 June 2009 19:01

i completely agree. There's nothing weird about this at all. I love me some bubble wrap.

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Friday 26 June 2009 16:12

I'm 17 and for my birthday last year I ended up with 2 rolls of the stuff. IT WAS AWESOME. This year, half of my presents were WRAPPED IN IT instead of wrapping paper. Again, AWESOME.

IMperfection_101 0

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Friday 26 June 2009 17:50

jealous of that

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Friday 26 June 2009 19:05

epic win.

Nearly

Today, I just had the best sex in all my life. After that, my ex-girlfriend dumped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65

You deserved it 6

Today, I found out my dog of 11 years has very severe cancer. Her spleen, which has swollen to the size of a football, had a small rupture a day ago and would fatally within a week, we'll be putting her down tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 133

You deserved it 8

Spicy

Spicy

Today, I’d been bicurious for years but always much too shy to seek out a woman to attempt intimacy. Well, I finally hooked up with a girl I’ve had a crush on for a while. Not only was it an amazing, mind-blowing experience, she also left me with a crotch searing yeast infection from hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 111

Today, for the first time I had to lie to the man I intend to marry, because I had a very intense and hot dream about Leslie Nielsen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 449

You deserved it 133