Today, I called my mom to tell her that I'm coming over for a visit. She answered: 'Why? What do you need? Food? Money? I'm not going to help you! You're a grown woman!' And she hung up. I just found out that I'm pregnant and she was the first person I wanted to share it with. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, I called my mom for the first time in a few weeks, just to chat because I miss her. When she picked up, the first thing she said was, "Why are you calling? What's wrong? Do you have swine flu??" When I told her that I didn't, and I just wanted to chat, she hung up. FML
Today, I went to my parents' house after escaping my abusive relationship. My mom scoffed and said, “This is what happens when you move out, barely graduated high school, with a bum.” When I told her I was 3 months pregnant, she said, “And a child out of wedlock? You’re a lost case!” and slammed the door in my face. FML
Today, it's been a few weeks since I moved into my own place, so I decided to visit my parents. I rang to ask for a good time to come over but all I got was basically, "Nope, you’re moved out now, a grown up, no longer our problem, ring us when you get some girl pregnant with our first grandbaby, bye." FML
Today, I tried to contact my birth mother, who abandoned me when I was three weeks old. After months of tracing, I finally plucked up the courage to call her. She told me to "f*ck off and die". FML
Today, I called my mother to tell her about my terminal cancer diagnosis. She responded with, "What makes you think I care at all?" before hanging up. FML
Today, I called my mom to tell her that I finally got my period. There was an awkward pause. She was at work. I was on speakerphone. FML
Today, for the first time in over a year, my mother actually called me. I excitedly picked up the phone. All I heard was rustling; her purse dialed me. FML
Today, my mom came home heavily drunk. As I was taking care of her, she told me all about how I was a mistake. That didn't hurt nearly as much as when she told me she wishes I'd died during her pregnancy. FML
Today, I told my family that I’m pregnant. My sister is upset and refuses to accept she’ll have to help with the baby. I’m a single mom going to college and living at home, and will need help. FML
Today, I told my mom I was 3 months pregnant, expecting her to be happy. Instead, she screamed that I was no longer her daughter and she never wanted to see me again before throwing me out of her house, because I got pregnant out of wedlock. Nice math mom. I've been married for 5 months. FML
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Top comments
tjsomethin 9
Dont tell her, and then about a year after the baby is born, go over and see what happens.
DocBastard 40
Just go over there unannounced and inform her very calmly that you've decided to quit your job to become a lesbian stripper. After she's had her fit, yell "Just kidding! I'm pregnant!" She'll be so happy that she'll forget the whole food and money thing.
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Comments (205)
happy_dino 6
Well... She ain't gonna the be the first one anymore..
ELTri 0
I agree that sucks. Have the baby and then take it to her. Then tell her she was going to be the first to know...
NYR1926 0
just show up to her house with a baby
cokyspaniel 0
just tell her you are pregnant. she' ll be happay
hulababyrock 0
that's ****** up!!
JoshForever 0
aww
thecovert 7
Jeez, NOW you're gonna want her to babysit the damn twerp! You just take take take!
bearboi32 0
call her the f#*k back
SAgirl 23
Why ells would she say that unless thats what you usualy go there for?
Milky54321 0
dont tell her for 10 months then when she call up and says why didnt u tell me why would i tell you all i want is food money and a granmother whos not a bitch then hang up