Today, I called my girlfriend saying "I think we need to break up." She said "No, I don't think so," and hung up. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I called in to my girlfriend's favorite radio station to propose. After spending what seemed like an eternity telling her how much I love her and I want to spend the rest of my life with her, she took a deep breath, said, "How about no?" and hung up. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she heard me say "love you" on the phone. I was talking to my mom. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my girlfriend. Just as she said "I love you", the credit on my phone runs out. She now thinks that I've purposely hung up on her. She refuses to speak to me until I tell her the real reason I hung up. FML
Today, I called my boyfriend and a woman answered. Turns out, she's also his girlfriend. She broke up with me on his behalf. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML
Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He said no. FML
Today, I went out for a drink with my girlfriend. Everything was going smoothly until her phone rang, she took the call and cut whoever it was off quite quickly by saying, "I can't talk right now, I'm in the middle of a break-up." I certainly wasn't aware. FML
Today, my girlfriend started a conversation with "I don't want to break up" and ended the conversation with "I think I'd be better off alone." So I guess I'm now single. I think. FML
Today, I told my long-distance girlfriend that I just could not handle the distance and we should just be friends. To which she responded, "What? You thought we were going out? Lol". FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was ecstatic. Apparently, she'd been trying to figure out how to break up with me for the past four months. FML
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Top comments
g_ayvel 11
I can only imagine what she would do if you told her in person
AvengedSevenfold_fml_fml 12
I can see who wears the pants in the relationship XD But seriously, that sucks T_T
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Comments (285)
darthzerg 7
Women are crazy...
Nwthatzfunny 9
Your girlfriend is a beast
brianjman14 23
Just stop seeing her. She'll get the message...hopefully.
Dracoboxer357 36
^ Never underestimate the power of denial. :p Eventually, that may work, after several weeks of possibly putting up with more and more desperate, stalker-like behavior. IMHO, OP should have done it face to face, calm but firm, and in no uncertain terms, made their break up a very clearly understood fact. She deserves that much, since he had chose to date her once before.
pottymouthpanda 0
File a police report, you just lost your balls
Mopmob02 18
Well it looks like she know what she wants in her life. You seem to be on of those things, good luck to you good sir.
strawberrywine22 30
How about growing some balls and breaking up with her face to face, tomorrow when it isn't assumed everything is a joke?
pagullarka 9
Too late for that but maybe he can have his mother talk to her.
corleon198425 22
It's obvious who wears the pants l. Man up bro seriously when writing the story of your life don't let anyone else hold the pen
stewpididiot 11
Tonite, when she's asleep, be vewy vewy kwiet... Stick your hand into her purse or maybe her pants and root around a bit to see if maybe you can find your balls !!!
lylotrezor 20
Breaking up over the phone is cowardly. Doing it on April 1st is stupid. YDI.
betterNowThanLat 5
agreed #99 :)
BrysGirl27 14
Hahaha guess she wears the pants in the relationship:)