Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I was sad, but the only thing my mom could say was, "You should have waited until I got him to mow the lawn." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me in my front yard. As I stormed off in my dramatic exit, I realized I had locked myself outside. I had to ask my now ex-boyfriend to borrow his phone so I could call my mom. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because apparently my mom hates him and doesn't want us to be together. My mom died six years ago. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. After breaking the news to my parents, I heard my dad mutter when I left, "Damn it, I liked her better than him." My mother didn't protest. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me. I tried to hide my sadness from my mom. She still noticed, and tried to cheer me up. She took me to a funeral. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. How? He invited my mother to his house for coffee with his parents, and told her. She then had to come home and tell me I’d been dumped. FML
Today, my boyfriend of 3 years called my house even though I was with him at the time. He needed to talk to my mom. He asked her to break up with me for him. FML
Today, my boyfriend of two years broke up with me. Why? He said his mom didn't want us together anymore. His mom died three years ago. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. Apparently, he spoke with my mom and the fact that she wants me dead is a huge red flag. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he wasn't feeling our two-month relationship was up to par with his parents' 30-year marriage, and, furthermore, I wasn't similar enough to his mother. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend after concluding we're not compatible at all. He said he knew it all along, but he thought I was "good for all the house stuff." FML
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Top comments
dipsheep 11
Hey someone's gotta do it.
Welshite 40
Arbitrarily using your daughter as blackmail for household chores.
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Comments (93)
Alchemist_21 26
Wow, that's really insensitive of your mother. I hate when people make break-up jokes the same day as the break-up. It's like kicking you when you're down.
Godsofdracos 15
If you kick them when they're up they might fight back.
woainishamu 21
With the way your mom said that, she probably was doing something with your bf on the side ;)
KiaKarma 11
How does this imply that her mother and ex were doing anything? It's common for boyfriends to help out, it shows respect.
J3R3MYY 14
I can say without a doubt this is what my exes mom would have said. Wait are you my ex OP?
Emosafire 10
Well it could be worst.., my boyfriend broke up with me ... And my mom said that she wished I would have had sex with him to keep him XD
JimmyHasNoHands 7
Later, you will appreciate the humor in the matter. your mom probably knew right away that he wasn't going to be around for so long.
brianaswagdriver 1
Use that bastard
vlalam 24
Ur moms funny
JMichael 26
Hey if you can get free labor go for it.
olpally 33
Sureeee... "Mow the lawn." Haha, she could have meant that in a dirty way too. But that's just me :P
cannon980 5
your moms awesome.