Today, I boarded my flight and sat next to a man. I told him I had hoped he was a hot woman and he concurred. He said at least I wasn't obese and I replied "At least you aren't smelly". Minutes later I realize he had the most disgusting foot odour ever... the barefoot kind. I suffered for 11 hours. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I'm on a 14-hour flight, stuck next to a large man whose rancid body odor is eclipsed only by his constant flatulence, which he loudly blames on me every time. On my other side is his friend who laughs like a moose at everything. There are no empty seats and no-one will trade with me. FML
Today, I was on a 12-hour transatlantic flight. I asked the flight attendant where the rancid smell was coming from. The guy sitting next to me started laughing, saying, "Sorry, something I ate is not agreeing with me." This was hour one of the flight. FML
Today, I had a several-hour-long flight. I was put in a seat at the very back of the plane. Before the plane even lifted off, a woman took a dump in the bathroom that I stank for the rest of the flight. Whenever I tried to get some sleep, the flight attendant walked past, savagely jostling me. FML
Today, I'm on a 16 hour flight. Five minutes in, the lady on one side has clipped her toenails onto me and the guy on the other side has the most horrific gas I have ever smelled. To help this problem he bought a cheese plate from the stewardess. 15 hours and 55 minutes to go. FML
Today, I'm in the middle seat on a flight to Dallas. The guy on the aisle is sleeping with his mouth open and I can smell his breath. I feel nauseous. FML
Today, on the airplane, the kid behind me kicked my seat hundreds of times, while the big bald guy next to me farted deadly ones repeatedly. I was on a non-stop 14-hour flight. FML
Today, I got stuck in an elevator with a stranger. We made awkward small talk until the elevator started smelling like something was burning. Turns out, the elevator was overheating. We had to spend 30 minutes stuck there, and I learned way too much about this guy’s weird foot fungus. FML
Today, I was at the airport walking around, killing time. There was a man about twenty years older than me who kept on eyeballing me, and it really wasn't flattering. I get on the plane and guess who I get to sit next to. FML
Today, I discovered the worst possible situation in which to get explosive diarrhea: on a 9-hour transatlantic flight. Next to an attractive single guy. FML
Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
graciedacie 0
He had hoped he was a hot woman as well? Interesting....
Compass 0
At least you and a stranger got comfortable. A lot of people either wouldn't participate in such conversation or would get offended.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (40)
kitkatkelly 0
Too bad, sounds like it could have been an entertaining flight otherwise.
Cruth 2
FYL I know the feeling… There's a guy in my class who has the same smell in his mouth... I always avoid him at all cost and when it's impossible to ignore him, I just face the other side while he talks and I ignore him
HannahBabe 0
in the bright side, you prolly made the smelly man feel better about himself
PottentialFML 0
YDI it for not pulling a misery and smashing his feet
BurningUp 0
the worst part is..foot odour can be smelled by the foot owner as well..so he probably knew
Jacob2014 0
Where the hell did you fly for 11 hours???
dakrock13 0
theres like a million and 1 places he could have been flying for 11 hours. it takes 11 hours to get from south florida to british columbia...and theres lots of places farther away from each other than those 2
sarcdude 3
Oh lord, I'd really hate to be you OP. Better luck on the hot woman next time.
monicab 0
mile high club
YeahFMLxX 0
YDI (Odor) jackass !
igroomdogs 0
get your head out of your ass. The English-speaking world outside the United States spells odour with a 'u' in it.
cindybuzz 5
Don't be silly, nowhere other than America speaks or writes in English! I'm English, but I'm probably writing in Korean, yes?
ColdGold 6
and you are so good at it that an American can read it! Good for you!
EveryDayJackAss 0
buy a gas mask next time