Get me out

By Anonymous - 21/03/2011 18:36 - United States

Today, I'm on a 16 hour flight. Five minutes in, the lady on one side has clipped her toenails onto me and the guy on the other side has the most horrific gas I have ever smelled. To help this problem he bought a cheese plate from the stewardess. 15 hours and 55 minutes to go. FML
I agree, your life sucks 40 464
You deserved it 3 245
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Top comments

KingDingALing 9

Fart in your hand and sniff it. If that doesn't scare them away, start talking about how you need to take a monster shit but the bathrooms are occupied. Then suggest taking a shit in the vomit bag and make it look like you're about to actually do it.

25 0
Lucie_love 4

You should totally creep them out for doing that. Just stick your hand down your pants and jack off.

11 0

Comments

EmoGiana 0

Oh, she will. Ha ha I guess that the lady with the toe nails would have got a piece of my mind, but the man with the gas would get some smart ass comments from me :)

1 0
5t3ff1k4h 44

******* people. You don't clip your nails in public, especially on a bus or in a plane. You just don't.

0 0
notmrfreakster 0

The lady with the toe nails would not be allowed on the plane. Thus this FML is a fail.

0 0
kennababy 0

oh :( well it's still pretty funny :)

0 0
tulsafml 0

I told OP I was sorry! I was just really gassy that day!

0 0
Ihatethesenames 0

wat if the toe nails got in the cheese

0 1
LuvliyBerdy 0

Don't worry after 16 hours she probably got used to it.

0 0
TheNinjaCat 10

urn guys? last I heard, or went on a plane (last week) you couldn't actually use the internet mid-flight D:

0 0
iBanana 17

Some airlines sell Wi-Fi services mid flight. I travel a lot :))

0 0
TheNinjaCat 10

ahh fair do's. I travel alot, and I didn't know this! I even go business and 1st class and I didn't know this :3 hahaa I'll have to check that out!

0 0
shinydragonmist 0

sorry about that go do something very obnoxious i am sure that will help fyl

2 0
liquidfireKAN 0

I agree, you should barf on the toe nail clipper while she is sleeping then ask " do you feel better now? " when she awakes. Lol

0 0
mamamiaaa_fml 12

make eye contact and keep it while slowly reaching over and squeezing their inner thigh then make your eyes roll to the back of your head and let out a slight moan. they'll either move you or one of them. if you stay repeat on other person.

4 0
xFalftastic 1

How'd she get the nail clippers past airport security? That old woman is ninja.

1 0
Jvr91 8

speaking of Asians.... atleast op wasnt flying to japan

0 0
Krissi_Lynn9330 0

that sucks really bad

1 0
KiddNYC1O 20

You kind of look like Mila Kunis in that picture.

0 0
Kelita 0

hmmm...she kinda does....take it as a compliment lol

0 0
Lucie_love 4

You should totally creep them out for doing that. Just stick your hand down your pants and jack off.

11 0
mendozaale 0

hahaha...wait whaaa??

0 0
cathylee22 4

since when are toenail clippers allowed on a plane, isn't that considered a weapon now a day?

0 0
EmoGiana 0

Yep. That's why FML's get me angry.. nothing these people post is real.. It's all something they made up in their head or got an idea from another FML.

0 0
EmoGiana 0

Why was my comment moderated? All I said is that it is impossible to bring toe nail clippers on a plane!

0 0
A7X_LoVeee 10

Uhhh... Anyways...OP why wouldn't you tell the woman to stop and say something to the man to go take a shot in the bathroom or something.

0 0
andreabeth95 2

no pun intended :)

0 0
andreabeth95 2

oh you can tell, when there's no smiley they didn't mean it for a pun :)

0 0
TheDrifter 23

Report the nail clipper lady as a potential terrorist. Nail clippers are banned from carry on. Maybe they'll emergency land the plane and you'll be able to catch a flight that they're not on. It that or ask for a blanket and Dutch oven the man next to you until he passes out.

7 0
Jenmaree 9

I don't understand how she got through security with them. Don't buy it.

0 0
KingDingALing 9

Fart in your hand and sniff it. If that doesn't scare them away, start talking about how you need to take a monster shit but the bathrooms are occupied. Then suggest taking a shit in the vomit bag and make it look like you're about to actually do it.

25 0