Today, I begged a coworker to let me borrow her lighter for my smoke break, since I'd lost mine. She was reluctant because of my track record of losing the darn things. After my break I stopped to use the restroom really quick, and promptly dropped the lighter into the toilet. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, a man in a hurry asked me for a light. Not being able to find my lighter amongst the muddle inside my handbag, I handed him my lit cigarette so he could light his. He took it from me, started smoking it and walked off. FML
Today, some guy asked me if he could borrow my lighter. I said "of course," reached into my handbag, and gave him the lighter. He stared at me for a few seconds until I realised I'd given him a tampax. FML
Today, I was refilling my lighter. Afterwards, I gave it a test light. I must've spilled some fluid because my thumb caught on fire. FML
Today, due to the dry weather, my nose became dry and began to bleed so I plugged it with toilet paper and went about my business. Forgetting about it, I later went out to smoke a cigarette. Not paying attention, I lit the toilet paper on fire as well. FML
Today, I was on the toilet at work. After a very loud and very smelly session, I waited until the other stall had been vacated to keep my anonymity. As I leant forward for some toilet roll, my ID fell out of my pocket and into the next stall. When I came out, it was face up near the sink. FML
Today, I lost my cell phone. But found it again! And then dropped it in the toilet. FML
Today, I chuckled at a "No Smoking" sign as I lit my cigarette. I bent my head down to light it and somehow managed to light my hair on fire. FML
Today, I was in the bathroom at work when I ran out of toilet paper. There was another guy in the restroom so I asked him if he could hand me a roll. He laughed, called me a dumbass, turned off the lights and walked out. FML
Today, I was late for work. Trying to cut a few seconds off the clock, I tried to open my breakfast candy bar while taking a piss. I ended up pissing all over myself and dropping the bar in the toilet. FML
Today, my parents found cigarettes in my car. After a long argument lasting over an hour, I convinced them that they weren't mine and that I don't smoke. A few minutes later, I went to work. Guess who decided to visit me during my smoke break. FML
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Top comments
bombielol 20
just buy her a new one?
okay33 12
You flushed that chance away!
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Comments (92)
SEABASSr0130 11
That's why you shouldn't smoke! ;)
The_FreshPrince 8
Most lighters still work after they get wet. But assuming it's a public toilet you're better off buying a new lighter.
FelicityWishes 32
Buy her a new one..
thelaxersvlog 9
Stop smoking and you won't have to borrow one.
geekbait 5
YDI for smoking. Seriously that's one of the most stupid things you could do.
lilushi 8
Buy her a new one and quit smoking
PizzaDeliveryGrl 19
Mm, no one deserves this. One day I had to change the toilet paper in my bathroom, and before I went upstairs, my mother told me not to drop the toilet paper in the toilet. That's exactly what I did as soon as I tried to change the toilet paper. FYL, OP. Also, the smoking is not the issue here. Honestly.
dDailydDosage 8
"Promptly"? As in you did it on purpose? Shame on you. Even if it wasn't on purpose, you should've taken better care of other peoples things.i wouldn't blame anyone for not lending you their lighter, better start keeping up with your own. YDI
MehrunesDagon456 20
Ydi for smoking. You're only killing yourself, and polluting the air of other people.
KayleeFrye 39
Just replace the lighter, and try to be less scatterbrained. I keep several lighters in different places, just in case I lose one or forget one. One on my apartment balcony, one in my purse, one in my jacket pocket, one in my desk at work, etc.