Miscellaneous: Today, I asked my mom if I could join my friends in getting lessons...

By anonymous - 01/06/2009 07:05 - Korea Republic of

Today, I asked my mom if I could join my friends in getting lessons in self defense. My mom told me that I didn't need them because my face was a better weapon to repel anyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 207

You deserved it 5 297

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Same thing different taste

By Username - 28/09/2010 16:16 - France

Today, my mum suggested that I should take self-defense lessons just in case I ever get attacked. Jokingly, I said, "As long as I walk under street lamps, no one is going to touch me." She replied, "Well, you never know, they might mistake you for someone good looking." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 369

You deserved it 4 848

Not so Karate Kid

By Matthew - 09/03/2020 19:00 - United States - Juneau

Today, my mom told me to do karate with her, and so I said no. Now my mom won't let me do anything until I go do karate with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 341

You deserved it 339

'Murica

By Maryann - 08/02/2018 01:30

Today, I told my dad I started taking jiu-jitsu lessons. He responded by laughing and saying, "Martial arts are for pussies, you should just get a gun." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 331

You deserved it 649

By Anonymous - 29/09/2015 22:50 - United States - Howell

Today, my mom was watching me during my Taekwondo lessons. She was yelling at me to focus on my own work and to quit hanging out with the little kids. I'm the instructor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 863

You deserved it 1 798

By mommy_issues - 29/08/2009 16:46 - United States

Today, I was curious as to whether or not my mom was off of her medication. When I asked her, she pulled a knife on me. Looks like I got my answer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 164

You deserved it 4 527

By inpain - 17/03/2016 04:56 - United States - San Francisco

Today, in my self-defense class, we did an attack simulation. As I began to hit my attacker, my fist hit the top of his helmet, dislocating my shoulder. I then spent the next hour in the ER sobbing until it was popped back in. I need to learn to defend myself against myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 888

You deserved it 2 402

By Anonymous - 24/09/2011 04:40 - United States

Today, I received a serious concussion and several stitches to the back of my head. The attacker? My mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 563

You deserved it 2 945

Karate Kid

By Anonymous - 29/10/2021 08:00

Today, I took out a thief using my martial arts training. Everyone thanked me, even the police. My mom spent the rest of the day moaning that if I’d minded my own business, the thief would've been gone in two minutes, but thanks to me we had to waste an hour of her day off talking to the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 349

You deserved it 96

By -_- - 05/07/2013 21:59 - United States - Munith

Today, at a family dinner, my mother-in-law talked me into showing off some moves that I've learned in martial arts. I gently did a restraining hold on her. She screamed that I was trying to break her wrists, and kept the wounded act up all night, smirking as everyone gave me death glares. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 573

You deserved it 5 224

By Anonymous - 31/12/2014 20:29 - United States

Today, my mom tried to give me a pep talk to boost my self confidence. Somehow, it ended up turning into a conversation about how much of a loser I am and how I have no friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 076

You deserved it 2 871

fortytwo 0

Monday 1 June 2009 15:58

Inform her that you got all your looks from her.

Dogmaw 0

Monday 1 June 2009 15:57

Start leaving brochures for the worst nursing homes in town laying around the house.

Comments

lol_seriously 0

Monday 1 June 2009 16:13

LOL owned!

Jankae 0

Monday 1 June 2009 16:16

LOLOL OWNED. But yeah just tell her you got them from her.

rukusrazor 0

Monday 1 June 2009 16:21

Take a few punches to the face. It might straighten some shit up, or get it bad enough for surgery. FYMom.

lovesucksxxx 0

Monday 1 June 2009 16:33

Haha do what #2 said.

xHaniffax 0

Monday 1 June 2009 16:36

:O You should say that you got your genes from her or something similar what a bitch that's so out of order :O

tWitt3rBuG 0

Monday 1 June 2009 16:38

Ouch, sounds like she's being cheap so she doesn't have to pay for it. Don't take it to heart. Sorry

suaveneanderthal 0

Monday 1 June 2009 17:07

It's no ******* wonder that the FML's on here suck balls now because this site is run by the koreans, the french and all kinds of foreigners. No one cares where the hell you're from there #1 in fact it just pissed me off more.

lovely997 0

Monday 1 June 2009 17:09

COMMENT NUMBER 18 !!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHA :] MADE MY MORNING thankyouu

justme001 0

Monday 1 June 2009 17:12

That sounds downright abusive. Can't fight stupid, but hey, if she says that kind of stuff a lot, remind her that you get your looks from her. She'll hate that.