Today, for the first time all month I felt truly proud and accomplished. I finally figured out how to change the toilet seat. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, the highlight of my whole month was finally being able to take a solid crap. FML
Today, I unclogged a toilet. With my hand. For the second time this week. FML
Today, my toddler finally used the potty for the first time. I was so excited, I FaceTimed my mom to show her. My kid then proudly picked up the potty bowl and dumped it on my lap. FML
Today, during an emergency bathroom visit, I finally broke the toilet seat my fiance had nagged me for months to replace. The broken seat sent me sprawling to the floor. I was still shitting. FML
Today, the little boy I nanny for finally stood up and went 'pee-pee on the potty'. I started cheering and clapping, making a big deal out of it. I flushed while he smiled proudly and pooped on the floor. FML
Today, my son learned how to use the toilet for the first time. He was so excited he started peeing on the floor. FML
Today, it was the first day in my life that I fell into a toilet because someone left the toilet seat up. I'm a guy. FML
Today, after leaving for a two-week-trip, and thinking this time my mom would finally have no choice but to clean the dirty toilet herself for once, because I’ve been doing it the entire year, along with most other chores, I think you can guess what I did first thing upon my return. FML
Today, I was so proud I'd fixed the toilet with a hardware store part without even having to call a plumber. As I happily put the lid back on the tank, I dropped the lid, which broke the tank, spilling water everywhere. Now I need a new toilet, a new floor, and I have to call the plumber. FML
Today, I cleaned my toilet. I had forgotten it was white. FML
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Top comments
WavinFlag 3
just cuzz they are changing it doesnt really mean its broken...maybe they want the soft ones...
Valentina_Baby 7
It didn't say she broke it
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Comments (100)
onthetoilet 3
I won't quit your day job
onthetoilet 3
I won't quit your day job
MikieLem 0
congratulation..!! im proud of u op..hahahaha
doubleodoggy 0
good for you!
Capt_Oblivious 10
Congrats, you earned a 'throne'.
VioletRayOfSunsh 0
I'd be proud too...:/
suprmidgt 0
maybe she got one of those cushy ones. not being able to replace it though, that's bad. if you were a guy I'd say don't breed.
e2m2cent 0
u deserve a cookie :)
Sgrocks 5
this isn't really an fml it's more like an mlia I guess
baconboy_42 8
Good for you! Can you change your own oil, too?