Today, between my cats scratching every surface they can find, my boyfriend's snoring, and the dog barking at every slight noise outside, I'm unlikely to ever get more than 3 hours of sleep at a time. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Dr Dolittle
Today, my dog won't stop barking at his own shadow, my cat won't stop purring while kneading on me, and my new kitten won't stop squeaking. It's all very cute, but I can't sleep at all. FML
Hush
Today, and like every day before it, my boyfriend’s snoring is keeping me up all night. FML
Human! I request petting!
Today, my cat has made a habit of waking me and my husband up every morning by meowing in front of our bedroom door until we get up. This morning, I finally got her to stop, so I went back to bed hoping to sleep in for a while… Only to be kept awake by my husband’s snoring. FML
Today, it's 2am. I've been trying to get to sleep for the past two hours next to my snoring boyfriend. Every time I nudge him to shut him up, his body tenses, he farts, then goes straight back to snoring. FML
Zzzzzzz
Today, my fiancé, my two-year-old, and my dog are all sleeping peacefully next to me in our new king-sized memory foam bed. It's 2:15 in the morning. Why am I not sleeping? Because they all snore, one right after the other. It's like an endless song of snoring. FML
Sleepless in Longfield
Today, after not being able to sleep for two hours because my boyfriend wouldn't stop talking, he fell asleep and I was left wide awake. I listened to him snore for another three hours and only got a couple of hours sleep. He's not working today, but I am. FML
Today, not only does my cat rabidly attack my face if I don't let him sleep on my pillow, but he snores too. FML
Today, after barely sleeping all week, I tried some ASMR videos to help me fall asleep. Both my dogs and my husband are out cold, snoring so loud I can't even hear the ASMR. FML
Noisy boys
Today, my roommate's dogs dictate where I sleep. When my roommate doesn't work, I get to stay in my bedroom. When he does work, I have to go into the living room because they will bark at me simply because I exist until he comes back. I'm already an insomniac; loud dogs are a little overkill. FML
Noise
Today, I'm spending the night at my family’s house. I have to share a room with my two kids and their mother. The three of them snore like warthogs in a zoo. Desperate for sleep, I went to go sleep on the couch. The dog sleeping on the rug snores like an old truck. I’m never going to get any sleep. FML
Top comments
sallen0046 4
So you've surrounded yourself with animals you did not bother to train - that's your fault. As for the boyfriend, you've chosen to complain about the snoring instead of getting him to reposition or getting him checked out to see what's causing the snoring - again, your fault. Either buy some ear plugs or get used to the noise.
denvan 0
Next time go buy ear plugs and you'll be set
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Comments (51)
Focker218_fml 0
Kick the cats out and get some nose strips for the beau
Lisa89 3
Put your cats in a seperate room and buy them a scratch post. Get your boyfriend treated for his snoring or sleep in a different room to him for the time being. Allow your dogs inside and train them not to bark. Get some good quality earplugs. Sorted. You seem to not know how to look after your pets... cats need a scracth post for their claws for starters.
wednesdeyy 5
OKAY, OP IGNORE EVERYONE ELSES POSTS! THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE. Take them all into the backyard and shoot them
AtrumMessor 1
Kill 'em all. Problem solved.
aardvarkish 16
50, I recommend killing them one at a time until the rest get the point.
bigmarkie2 3
I'd say declaw the cat, shock collar for the dog, and a pillow over your botfriends face? Just a suggestion XD
DriAA7 17
If only there was a contraption, like a plug to go into ones ear to cancel out noises such as these. Dumbass. You don't desrve sleep.
MrBobby_fml 7
That's what you get for owning cats and dogs.... as to the boyfriend, it's your decision if he's worth it. Or you could just make him sleep in another room.