Today, at work in a nursing home, I had to kill imaginary dogs in the lunch room, because they were evil and trying to eat everyone. This started with just one person seeing them, to all 30 of them screaming and freaking out. I spent 45 minutes killing imaginary dogs. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the elderly lady I work for got mad at me, all because I wouldn't feed her imaginary friend. FML
Today, my school brought in therapy dogs to help with stress. I was attacked by one of them. FML
Today, I started my dream job of being a veterinarian. My first day consisted of having to put down 12 dogs and 5 cats. FML
Today, I realized that my dog is an evil genius. As I sat down to have a snack, he barked as if he saw someone outside. I went to check it out, but nobody was there. When I returned, I found my dog on the table finishing off my bacon sandwich. FML
Today, while I was pet-sitting for my boyfriend's parents, one of their dogs killed one of their kittens. FML
Today, I work at a doggy day care. Employees are not allowed to leave the dogs unsupervised for any reason. So while I was alone in a yard, my stomach decided that it would be the perfect time to empty itself. Because I didn’t want to lose my job, I puked in front of everyone. FML
Today, it was my first day working at a dog boarding kennel. I got bit... by my coworker. FML
Today, I heard whimpering while I was in my bedroom. Thinking it was my parents doing something nasty, I let them do it and turned on my music. My parents came home from work and I realised they were never home. I went into the room and saw my dead dog laying on the floor. FML
Today, my dog barked at his own reflection in the mirror for five full minutes. When I tried to calm him down, he started barking at me like I was in on the conspiracy that seemed to be going on in his head. FML
Today, I was really hungry at work, and my stomach growled loudly. One of my co-workers heard it and thought it was a cat. Ashamed, I played dumb and we ended up spending twenty minutes looking for a cat that I knew didn't exist. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Krirn 21
They weren't seeing dogs, they were just bored.
dude1122332 9
50 points a kill, you'll prestige in no time!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (194)
Bigmoneyshotz 0
That what you get for Switching out their meds with tic-tacs!
karen1991 15
I worked at a couple nursing homes...this kinda stuff does happen..
PandaSpots 10
Lol I wish I was there to see that. Did you have fake daggers and swords too?
emoshadow47 9
I dont care who you are... Youre my new roll model, a close second to charlie sheen.
coolbrony12 3
Well it's all part of working with the elderly... Or 3-5 year olds...
pjsr 33
You're a good employee! Wish there were more of you - nursing home work is difficult, & you really seem to care about the residents.
scr_sensei 14
That is imaginary animal cruelty and you should be ashamed. The ASPCIA is totally gonna get all up in your shit.
etoilenuit 15
Poor dogs :-(
Blooblibloo 4
I think they are meeting with your mind OP.
AwsumShyGuy 12
Lure the dogs into a truck and take them to Fosters.