Today, at work, a customer left their cell phone behind. I tried to see if there were any pictures so that I could identify them. No, I still don't know what they look like, but I have seen their penis. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I accidentally left my cell phone at the restaurant. When I realized my mistake, I went back to see if anyone had found it. They said no, so I gave them my number to call if it turned up. I realized later that I'd given them my cell phone number. FML
Today, a customer checking out a camera at my pawnshop asked if the memory cards got erased. I said yes. He asked if I had a case for it and I left to get it. I came back and the guy said, "There's naked pictures on this memory card!" I Look at the LCD screen and it's a picture of his own dick, which he'd just taken in the store. FML
Today, no matter how much I begged, my friend who'd locked himself away with my iPhone wouldn't stop taking pics of his penis and forwarding them to my boss. FML
Today, I left my phone at work. After returning to the office to retrieve it, I noticed it was not on my desk as it usually is. I went to the front office and found it on the desk, unattended. When turning on my phone, I was greeted by my new lockscreen: a crap someone took in the bathroom. FML
Today, I copied some files to my phone while borrowing my grandfather's laptop. As I selectively deleted the files from the recycle bin, I noticed some pictures, and ended up seeing way more than I wanted to of his erect penis. FML
Today, I was showing my boss a picture on my phone. I didn’t expect her to take my phone from my hand and continue to flip through photos. I anxiously motioned for her to give my phone back, only to realize she had already swiped to my nude picture. FML
Today, in the break room at work, I was looking through my email on my phone about my Amazon orders. There was a suggested product that looked like a dildo. I turned around to see my boss behind me glancing at my phone. FML
Today, my teacher confiscated my cell phone for text messaging. He said he would give it back if the next text that I would receive was important. I prayed the guy I've been texting didn't send the dick pic he said he was going to. He did. FML
Today, my friend asked me if I flirted with any girls during our shift. I said, "No, not any I could think of." He then told me there was a note on my windshield that said, "Call me" with a phone number on it. After my shift, I went to my car excited and read the note. It was just a penis. FML
Today, some guy sent a dickpic to my phone. I was disgusted, and wanted to find out who did it. I called the police, and they matched the number to my stepfather's new phone. FML
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Top comments
canadian_ftw 8
you couldn't just look through their contacts instead..?
Shorty_Shaza 5
Why do some guys always take pictures of their penis?
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Comments (139)
p33dmypant5 0
sleep around till you recognize it
ryanriola 0
i think you wanted to see it.
slap_u_much 6
call their home contact next time so u wont get scarred for life again
slap_u_much 6
or send that pic to their mom lol
hrlz001 0
i don't think i even have a picture of myself on my phone....and def not a pic of my ****
Obelia 3
lol I'd actually call this a win!
babez11 0
hubba hubba can u send me some of thoses pikz please!!!!!
EvilDave 13
The single possessive male pronoun is "HIS" not "THEIR".
EvilDave 13
@83 No. "Their" is the possessive case of the word "they". "They" is the plural pronoun for "he", "she", and "it". The (incorrect) habit of using "they" as a gender neutral singular pronoun comes from Political Correctness and attempting to avoid annoying the feministas who fly off the handle at the use of the masculine pronoun. It is not archaic, nor is it correct.
sk3l370n 0
yea i did that to my coworker too